Bravo CC

The case of the DIAGONAL twins: Does YOUR Story RESONATE?

2011-12-12T06:33:00.000-08:00

Once Upon a Time....

When my daughter Maddie was about 4 years old, she came into my office where I was working diligently to tell me about her new friends. As it turns out these two friends were twins. One of them was 4 years old and one of them was 5 years old. I listened to her story with great interest and enjoyed the details of this new friendship through the eyes of this little person. Eventually there was a pause in her telling of the story and I told her "Maddie I think twins have to be the same age as one another". Without skipping a beat she looked at me and said "I know mom, but these are diagonal twins". Cue laugh track.

She loves that story. So do I and over the years we have told and retold that story to friends and family and even just between the two of us. It captures the innocence and joy of being a child and illustrates why shows like "kids say the darndest things" was such a big hit.

The value of a good story told cannot be measured. It connects us to the teller of the story and creates emotional responses that in turn cause us to consider or reconsider the underlying issue told in the story. Stop for a minute and think about how many stories you tell in one day and in turn how many stories are told to you. I can guarantee you that a good deal, perhaps even 50% for some people, of our communication is done through the telling of a story.

Do you tap into the POWER of your story in ways that other people want to participate in whatever it is you are selling: your friendship, your business, your product, your service? Because yes, stories do sell things. They sell ideas, points of view, they even sell the person telling the story. In our personal life many of us are far more likely to tell and share stories with our family and friends. Why not in business? The business world prefers, even gives preference to facts, figures, statistics, charts, graphs, evidence. Now, these things are in fact very important but should not be chosen in lieu of a good story.

The combination of evidence + story is where persuasion happens.

Knowing that, do you and your organization have control of "the story" of

WHO WE ARE

WHERE WE HAVE BEEN

WHERE WE ARE GOING

HOW WE ARE GOING TO GET THERE

WHY WE ARE GOING THERE

WHO IS GOING WITH US

To determine the answer, here are THREE questions you should be asking in your organization to determine the potency of your story:

1. Can everyone tell the story of the organization's beginnings from the top down? (do they know the mission statement for the organization is another potential question to see if your story has internal sticking power).

2. How does our story compare to that of our competition? The power of a GREAT story is that it is unique. If your story looks and sounds a whole lot like the story of your competition then you are in trouble buddy. Better get some heads around the table and have a brainstorming session to find a story that will differentiate you from everyone else.

3. Does your story match up in all contexts: internally, marketing, who customers say you are, on your website? A consistent story means branding and branding means name recognition. Name recognition means market share.

Never ever underestimate the power of STORY. The worlds greatest brands--Coke, Nike, Apple--are the best storytellers around. Become more academic about telling your story for a while until you perfect this all too important art form.

Need help? That's what Bravo CC is around for--we teach people how to stand out in a CROWDED and COMPETITIVE Marketplace. You can see our upcoming events including "Death By Presentation", a webinar AND "What's YOUR Plan BE? 2012" the workshop. Dates and details can be found HERE

Finally, take a look at this Bravo CC Slideshare presentation on STORYTELLING.

The stories we_tell

View more presentations from Libby Spears

You kinda smell like coffee...why I am a small business owner

2011-12-08T12:34:00.000-08:00

You kinda smell like coffee..musings from a small business owner

I think there was a point that my kids thought I was a barista at Starbucks. I would come home and smell of coffee, really excellent and delicious coffee, but coffee none the less. No Lancome did not come out with a new perfume eau de coffee. My perfume was compliments of keeping office hours at the local Starbucks, or the Starbucks up the street, or the Starbucks down the road from the client appointment. If you ask me "where is your office?" I will answer, straight faced and completely serious "whatever Starbucks I happen to land at that day"

God bless you Starbucks (note to self: ask accountant if I can tax deduct all those blessed cups of Joe).

There are many, many, many reasons I am a small business owner and it isn't just for my office hours at Starbucks. They include (in no particular order)

1. I don't like to be told what to do.

2. I am bad with rules and the whole follow the rules expectation that comes when working for others.

3. If I want to go on my kid's field trip to the Dallas Acquarium I will and I don't have to ask (beg) for permission.

4. I don't believe in the 40 hour work week or the 50 hour work week or the 60 hour work week. I believe in about a 30 hour work week--one where I work smarter not harder.

5. I want to be able to have big ideas and not have to get them blessed by the Pope, Tom, Dick, Harry and fourteen committees to run with it.

6. I like to bask in the glory from my success and take 100% responsibility for failures.

7. I like to take a long lunch sometimes. Or get a pedicure in the middle of a work day. I can open my lap top and situate in my lap while my toes get purty.

8. I get to define who I want to work with and what I want to work on. If I don't like someone I don't work with them.

9. I don't want to sign a 167 page employee manual written in an 8 point font.

10. I want to drink coffee at Starbucks with my laptop in front of me on a regular basis (doing it right now in fact).

But don't get me wrong. SB is not without it's own limitations and frustrations. Just as there are people you work with every day that test your resolve to maintain your calm, I too am challenged by people at SB as well. Here are a few of those people:

1 The couple in their 50's who insist on making out whilst she sits in his lap in the leather chair and I am next to them and cannot command my peripheral vision to tune them out.

2. The idiot who thinks it is perfectly acceptable to SKYPE with someone on their computer in the middle of Starbucks. Are you freaking kidding me? No really--you are kidding me right?

3. Akin to #2--the person who has SUPER IMPORTANT WORLD CHANGING phone conversations in SB. Look--SB is not the place to have these conversations. And pssstttt....you aren't that important.

4. People who discuss delicate and conflict laden topics at their table not realizing (or perhaps they realize and don't care) that everyone can hear their business. We don't want to know your business. We don't care. We have our own business to attend to. Go away.

5. Teenagers. Really no need for explanation on that one. I just don't like teenagers.

There are trade offs in everything we do. Being a small business owner can be a lonely journey. I don't have the comfort of working with a group of people in close proximity on a common and shared purpose. Yes--I have created around me a group of like minded business people who share my same values and mission and we support one another but I don't have the benefit of working in an office with people day in and out. These people become family--for better or worse--and I get the appeal of that.

So the next time we see one another, please don't sniff me to verify that I smell like coffee, just take my word for it. And I promise--you will never see me making out with my husband in the leather chair next to you at Starbucks (unless of course you want us to).

Outsourced! THREE reasons outsourcing is not a dirty word when it comes to training and development

2011-11-01T13:32:00.000-07:00

These days, OUTSOURCED is a pretty dirty word. More on that in a moment. But first, a story.

I had a small group meeting today with a few of the leaders in my Leader on Loan program at Panera to work on some project development issues. If you are not familiar with the concept of "Leader on Loan", it is a brilliant combination of professional training + volunteering for the United Way. This group is "on loan" for a seventh month period where they meet monthly (and sometimes twice a month) to participate in group workshop training on important issues surrounding their professional development + work on United Way Projects as volunteers.

That leads me back to this morning's tete a tete. In the course of our conversation unfolding, one of the group members took a minute to blow off some steam. He works in a high pressure, high stress, high burnout industry and on this particular day, the four or so hours he worked before meeting with us had felt like 40 hours due to some unexpected issues that arose. We listened sympathetically and responded when needed but I knew our responses were neither here nor there--he just needed to unwind a minute. And we let him.

Why should you outsource your T&D program?

GREAT Question.

The above scenario starts our list off

REASON #1:
An OUTSIDER is not politically connected to the inner-workings of your organization. One of the best parts of what I do is developing relationships with people who long for an ear to listen. Everyone has problems, frustrations and gripes. As I build trust with them, they in turn trust me enough to reveal some of their disappointments and issues in their professional (and sometimes their personal) life. I do not EVER throw them under the bus, reveal their conversations to others or play the role of problem solver. I just LISTEN. As an employer, it is easy to feel threatened by that. "I don't want my people bitching and moaning to you" but let me assure you--it is a valuable outlet for them AND for you. That's leads me to reason #2.

REASON #2:
Through these interactions, conversations and reveals I am able to really take the temperature of an organization and it makes what I do BETTER because I see where there is a TRUE need in the organization making your investment that much more worthwhile! Trust me on this one: my conversations are a far better thermometer than the yearly employee survey. Why? Because employees don't like surveys. People in general don't like surveys. Know what they do like? Having someone LISTEN to them!

REASON #3:
BEST PRACTICES from beyond your industry. People like me work with people like you, and Jim, and Sheila, and Mary, and Todd and Max and Marge. With each new client we add new dimensions to our own set of best practices and if we are really good, we can apply and plug in those practices to your organization. When a T&D program is driven internally it is easy to get stuck in a rut and think only from an organizational or industry perspective. An OUTSIDER doesn't run that risk if we are doing our job right.

I am not suggesting you outsource ALL of your T&D but it is worth considering at least using an OUTSIDER to fulfill some of your ongoing T&D efforts. These THREE reasons are just a start. There are multiple benefits when you find and hire the right person to do the job.

Yes, outsourcing is a bad word when it comes to moving American Jobs overseas but in the case of T&D using an outside source to help your organization reach it's goals is a fantastic idea.

That deserves a SHAMON!

Is Your Open Door Policy the Real Deal or just a CLICHE?

2011-10-23T22:27:00.000-07:00

How many of you have been hired on with an organization that seems too good to be true, only to find out that in fact....it was too good to be true. Far too often the distance between who we (the organization) say we are and who we really are is deep and wide. Take for example the ol' "open door policy" promise that many people are told upon being hired. The Real Deal or just a CLICHE?

In my experiences, one of the most common complaints from the people I work with is the lack of two way traffic between themselves and those who sit at the top of the totem pole. Color me uncomfortable, for example, when in a workshop on how to have better and more productive conversations, I see my workshop participants exchanging knowing glances. Being that I am a teacher, I don't usually let these knowing glances go without asking. "Hey is something interesting, confusing, funny or what? You guys have a funny look on your faces" to which I hear "We are just all wondering if our bosses have to come to this workshop".

As the outsider who is inside the organization to create teaching moments with team members, this is never a great experience for me as I the answer is almost always "No your boss is not going through this workshop".

I know what everyone is thinking in their head when I tell them this: "Then why are we here" and "This doesn't really matter then does it" and "Typical, they think we need to be fixed but our bosses have it all figured out".

Does your organization boast an open door policy? Do you tell new hires that when they join the organization they will have easy access to their boss to share their thoughts, ideas, opinions and ask questions? Now, go up and down the hall of your organization's decision makers and ask them how many real, authentic, conversations they have had today, this week, this month, this year--with their employees.

CONVERSATION is the heart beat of any organization. Without it, you don't know what is going on. The rule of thumb is that the higher you climb in an organization, the less easy access you have to what is actually going on in the organization. That means then that if you are a decision maker in the organization, you will have to work that much harder to make sure you are having conversations with your team members.

So, commit yourself to real, authentic conversations with your people today. How? Take a look at "Honoring the Open Door Policy"for some GREAT ideas on why conversation is important and how to have better conversations: Click Here

When you are done viewing this presentation, please share on facebook and twitter. Leave a comment on the Slideshare page and follow Bravo CC for more thought provoking presentations that will make you smarter!

Conversation is an art form. It takes practice, commitment and COURAGE to have authentic conversations with your team members. Now, go out there and get to talking....

Don't RED LINE Your T&D program for 2012. PUHHHHLEASEEE!

2011-10-12T14:47:00.000-07:00

2012 is right around the corner and many organizations are preparing their budgets for the coming year. No matter when your budget year begins and ends please hear my passionate plea:

DON'T FORGET THE T AND THE D--

TRAINING AND DEVELOPMENT

Great organizations know that their levels of employee performance and satisfaction with their job is not 100% tied to their paycheck. In fact....many employees report that their paycheck is not top of mind when considering the degree to which they are happy in their job. So what does get factored into deciding if one likes/loves or just tolerates their job and in turn makes them give that ol' 110% or just 10% to their job and organization?

Here is what we know. We know (the we being that group of academics like myself who love to research and study human behavior) that people who report they LOVE + HEART + GIVE THEIR ALL to their job are those who feel they contribute to the greater good of their organization's mission (and in order for that to happen there needs to actually be a mission that has been communicated by the leadership of the organization).

In order to contribute, employees also report that they want and need HIGH QUALITY training and development opportunities so that they can continue to grow and contribute. When an organization is willing to invest the time + resources + money toward developing their team it shows up in the organization's success. Ask any organization where T&D are a strong cultural value in the organization how they SEE the difference and they will tell you about changed behaviors, better team experiences, happier customers, and stronger leadership at all levels of the organization.

Measuring the ROI of T&D does not have to be just anecdotal either. You can measure the ROI with high quality feedback in the form of coaching, surveys and annual performance reviews if you want to quantify the outcomes of your efforts.

Now, take a look at some of the most COMMON T&D Fails that I come across working with clients.
Click Here for the full presentation

*After you view the presentation, please leave a comment on the Bravo CC Slideshare page and follow Bravo CC on Slideshare too. Get crazy and share on facebook and twitter as well!

Too often, T&D is the first thing to get red lined in the budget. That is a wrong, wrong, wrong move for any organization to cut out essential training for employees at ALL levels of the organization.

Remember--when your employees feel challenged, a part of the organization's higher mission, and feel like their organization is investing in their professional success they will work harder, faster and better!

Best Wishes for a GREAT 2012 budget!

Power Point is a Back Up Dancer.

2011-10-10T07:24:00.000-07:00

What is the most you have ever paid for a concert ticket? $100, $200, $1000 or perhaps even more? Well chances are no matter what you paid, the cost of the tickets was not justified in your mind because the back up dancers were going to be so amazing. No! We pay the money to see Tina Turner (or Britney Spears, or Lady Gaga, or Taylor Swift, or dare I say Barry Manilow) shake her tail feathers and sing her heart out. And the back up dancers? Well they are there to make TINA look good.

YOU are Tina Turner.

For far too long we have allowed Power Point to BE the presentation while the presenter simply stands to the side (often with back turned to the audience) reading the dull, lifeless and cluttered Power Point slides that were prepared as nothing more than giant notecards.

Look familiar? SO BAD! SO PAINFUL! Blech

It is time to put Power Point in it's place--backing you up in the presentation. It's job is to make you look good; to visually accentuate your message, not be the message itself. I often get resistance from the "business as usual"professional who simply cannot think about doing a presentation with their good old safety net the Power Point.

Imagine for a moment that Martin Luther King is alive and well in 2011 and is preparing to deliver for the first time his (what will be history making) speech "I have a dream". Do you imagine he would use a Power Point for the Presentation? I can just see it now--a slide with ten bullet points in 14 point font with a terrible stock image of kids holding hands. NO!

MLK would not use a Power Point. Neither would Lincoln to deliver the Gettysburg Address. Or Maya Angelou to recite why the caged bird sings. The greatest speakers know that the power to move an audience lies in their words, conviction, passion and ability to connect to the audience.

So do you abandon Power Point all together? Not always (but in some circumstances I say yes! get rid of the Power Point and YOU be the presentation). If you are going to use Power Point then use it wisely--quit making slides that are nothing more than giant notecards. Challenge yourself to create a presentation that has ZERO bullet points in the entire presentation. AND use this rule as your guide: Slides should VISUALLY reinforce the ideas you are communicating. If your slides don't do that then start over.

To get some GREAT ideas on how to use Power Point more effectively, click on the presentation below and you will get a new appreciation for the POTENTIAL of a KICK AWESOME slide presentation. Please share this presentation on facebook, leave a comment on slideshare and follow Bravo CC for future presentations.

Power Point is a Back Up Dancer click here

http://www.slideshare.net/BravoCC/power-point-is-a-back-up-dancer

The lesson is clear--when a Power Point doesn't know it's place you get a Kevin Federline type situation. Too big for his britches, Kevin thought he was on par with his boss Britney Spears. And shame on her--she allowed it. Don't let your Power Point act like it's the star. It isn't. YOU are the Star!

Here's to your next presentation!

BE Picasso: THREE smart ways to nurture your creativity

2011-09-01T08:40:00.000-07:00

Silhouettes: A dance team from Denver CO, contestants
America's Got Talent. VERY Cool & SO CREATIVE
See them in Action Here

"I am not creative".

I can't tell you how many times I have heard those four little deadly words come from the mouth of a professional. Know this: YOU are CREATIVE. It is alive in you and may be dormant after years of not using your creativity but it is there and if you create the right conditions for yourself (and your team members, direct reports, organization, kids, family, etc) it will freely flow.

You can BE your own Picasso!

Can you create the right conditions for nurturing creativity? YES you can. The following THREE conditions will get you started.

#1: Create parameters for your creativity

When you tell someone or a group of someone's "BE creative" you get a lot of blank stares. An endless universe of possibilities will actually stifle creativity because it paralyzes people when there is too much to choose from. You need parameters to work within. Let me give you an example. In my presentation building workshops there is a lot of group work and opportunity to be creative. In order to create the right conditions for creative ideas to flow forth I say "Create a five minute presentation".

NO! I don't say that. Create a five minute presentation does not inspire ideas or movement on the part of the group it just makes them feel stuck--stuck like a brokedown car on the side of the creativity highway.

Instead I say: "Create a five minute career day presentation for a classroom of 10 year olds". Now there are some parameters to work with. If I sense the group is struggling, I will sit down and provide a little more. "Imagine this group of 10 year olds are in art class (or science or math)" or "Imagine these kids did a career assessment and they tested high for architecture and engineering" or "Imagine these kids come from homes where education is not a priority, their parents don't have high school diplomas and no one has ever been to college". My job is to "water and feed" the artist in each person in the group so that they can plug into their inner Picasso.

A few years ago I was working with a group of architects in a leadership group. One of their assignments was to create a career day presentation. Lauren, a smart and talented architect chose to do her presentation for a third grade girl scout troop (love the specificity of her audience!). She came in to do the presentation for me and started by handing my a big zip loc bag filled with construction paper, glue, scissors, and a pencil. Her presentation walked me (a third grade girl scout) through the process of designing a school. With each step I used something from my goodie bag to design my own school.

The presentation was in a word BRILLIANT (I still get a little teary eyed when I remember it!).

Once you draw the lines to work within, the next step for nurturing creativity is to

#2. BE ready to LABOR & BE OK with it.

Creativity, like anything else worthwhile, is a process. Part of that process is not fun. In fact it sucks. It might be a stage where you feel stuck, frustrated, exhausted, angry, defeated, agonized and more. And it is OK. It is a part of the process. Sit in it. Muck around in it. This part of the process is necessary and good. This stage is where break-throughs happen. Just when you feel like you are careening off the side of the mountain--SPARK! FIRE! FLAME! GENUIS! will happen. I know because I have been there. I have watched it happen.

Typically when you reach this stage you bail. This reaction is certainly understandable as this stage is uncomfortable and awkward (especially if you are working with a group). I can think of no better resource to direct you toward than Sally Hogshead's slide share on this stage of the creativity process. She calls it "Sit on the Throne of Agony" and you should take a few minutes to investigate. Click here to view "Sit on the Throne of Agony"

Our final condition then? Yes let's do it.

#3: Change your environment.

A stuffy office conference room is not the ideal spot for a creativity love fest. Foster conditions that are outside of normal to encourage creativity. Go on field trips. Visit museums, take a car trip down the interstate and look at billboard signs. Go somewhere and watch people and how they behave. Do something. Something different! Go outside and work in the air, sunlight, birds chirping and breeze blowing. Creativity needs some time outside the rigmarole of office life: phones, computers, interruptions, deadlines, email, voicemail, facebook, irritating co-workers, irritating boss (haha) and more.

Inspiration Exists but it has to find
us working | Pablo Picasso

I think Picasso and the other great masters would agree. There is an artist in all of us. There is one living in you. Throughout life our creativity gets beat out of us through our education, business life and more. But it is there. If you take the time to create the right conditions to nurture it, like a sleeping giant, it will emerge.

I wish you much success in your CREATIVE endeavors!

Don't Blame the BOX: My ode to the cardboard box + death to the business cliche

2011-08-14T17:49:00.000-07:00

I love the English language. I abhor cliche. Cliche is lazy. Of all the worst cliches used in the business world, the hands down winner is

"THINK OUTSIDE THE BOX"

Did you throw up in your mouth a little? So did I. This most terrible cliche suggests in some way that the "box" limits our creativity and opportunity to be inspired. Don't blame the box.

If you were once a kid (and we all were) I can imagine you spent at least one day playing in a cardboard box. You might have been an astronaut in your spaceship, a robber using your box as a get away car or a princess playing in her fairy tale castle. And if you are a parent I am sure you have spent a Christmas morning laughing that your kids enjoy the box their present came in more than the actual present itself.

Thanks to my friend Jeremy Ellis (who was once a boy and remembers the possibilities of a great cardboard box) I watched the loveliest short film from Studio Canoe aptly titled "Adventures of a Cardboard Box". It illustrates the beauty and endless possibilities of a cardboard box.

You probably had a smile on your face the whole time and loved all the fun that was had with that cardboard box. My favorite is the quick homage to Ghostbusters. I also loved the Indiana Jones shout out. You may have not counted while you watched but I counted FORTY different ways the young boy and his sister used the box to create fun and adventure for themselves. FORTY WAYS TO USE A CARDBOARD BOX!

The takeaway is simple. Quit blaming the box.

The box is not the reason you lack creativity or miss the opportunity to be open to inspiration. The box in fact is the perfect parameters by which inspiration and creativity can flourish. This begs the question

Why is it so darn hard to be creative?

If there is a finger to point I start first with the public school system for our collective lack of creativity. When does it happen? If I were to pinpoint an exact time I blame the third grade. It is at this point that things get serious and it starts with cursive writing. So many rules! No room to develop your own unique style of writing! And I ask you: who writes in cursive anymore? Very few people do except maybe my mom and all third grade teachers. But the great creativity zap does not happen in one fail swoop. The process to deactivate our creativity is systematic and little by little our creative juices seem to dry up like a lemon left out in the hot Texas sun.

Time for art, music, recess and other perfect places for creativity to reveal itself are getting shorter and shorter in the school day and in some school districts there is NO time in the day for these things. Fine arts budgets get slimmer and slimmer every year in favor of academics (yes important) and sports (yes important too). So where are we going to tap into our creative aptitude?

At home, exploring and adventure and fantasy have been replaced by video games, the computer, endless supplies of bad TV. Gone are the days that kids roamed their neighborhoods on a bike seeking adventure and play. As a kid myself, I spent HOURS across the street from my childhood home playing at the park, BY MYSELF, creating a rich fantasy land for myself.

Add to that the over scheduled, over involved life of the average 10 year old and there is little time to simply be a kid.

We are all creative. Typically our creativity manifests itself in one aspect of our lives either personally or professionally. Where does your creativity reveal itself? If you have blank stare on your face with a "what you talking bout Willis" line on the tip of your tongue: It is there--I assure you. If it has been laying dormant like a sleeping lion all these years how do you unleash the beast within? I will save the answer for the next post and tackle this burning question "Can I be MORE CREATIVE in my life?" The answer is a resounding yes and I can't wait to show you how.

Until then, go and find an empty box and see what you can come up with!

Who is your Jiminy Cricket?

2011-04-26T12:09:00.000-07:00

One of the greatest compliments I have received was in a recent text from my business partner. After we had a lengthy discussion about the frustrations of business, moving forward, what we want long-term, etc. I received a text from her that said: “You are my Jiminy Cricket.”

I have to admit, I wasn’t sure what she was talking about, so I went to Google and found the Wikipedia definition.

Jiminy Cricket is the Walt Disney version of "The Talking Cricket" (Italian: Il Grillo Parlante), a fictional character created by Carlo Collodi for his classic novel Pinocchio, which was adapted into an animated film by Walt Disney in 1940. Originally an unnamed, minor character in Collodi's novel, he was translated in the Disney version into a comical and wise partner who accompanies Pinocchio on his adventures, having been appointed by the Blue Fairy to serve as the official conscience for Pinocchio. Since his debut in Pinocchio, he has become a recurring iconic Disney character and has appeared in numerous other instances.

Who is your Jiminy Cricket? Who is your wise partner who accompanies you on your life’s journey’s and helps to serve as your conscience? I realized that day that we all need a Jiminy Cricket. I encourage you today to take a look at the people in your life and identify whether or not you have one. If you do, tell them. If you don’t, find one.

In some ways, life coaches are Jiminy Cricket’s to their clients. So if you are looking, I would be happy to be your Jiminy Cricket and accompany you along the way. I love adventure!

What’s going on in the back of your mind?

2011-04-19T21:10:00.000-07:00

My computer had been acting up for quite some time. Some days it was sluggish, other days it would time out, especially if I had more than one application open at the same time. I had a difficult time both rebooting and shutting it down. First, I chalked it up to the age of the computer but realized it wasn’t all that old. So, I gave up on fixing it myself and called Oscar, the computer whiz!

Oscar spent about an hour cleaning it up, running scans, erasing viruses and though it seemed a bit better, my computer was still not right. Finally, he realized that something… some program was constantly running in the background, which was the cause of all the problems.

Such is with our own minds. Maybe your background noise is a fear of death because you have had a diagnosis with cancer. Maybe its guilt because you think you should be at home with your children rather than running a company. Maybe its food—always worried about gaining weight! For me, it’s finances. Not because there isn’t enough but because I feel the pressure of being the only bread winner! So I fret even without knowing I am fretting. Frankly, it’s exhausting!

Do you have something running in the background affecting how you go about life? To have something constantly running in our minds not only robs us of energy and time, but most of all, peace and joy!

I hope in some small way, I have been your Oscar today and that you will be able to identify what, if anything is always running in the back of your mind. Now that I have figured out my background noise, I have been able to put it into perspective and find that I am not nearly as weighed down by finances. I hope you can do the same.

I believe the only way to evaluate how we are living is to evaluate how we are not living. -Toni Morrison from Getting to Happy

2011-04-12T20:32:00.000-07:00

I have been taking frequent trips to Florida lately to enjoy the warmth and sunshine that winter does not offer in other parts of the country. During one of my trips, my friend and I decided to take a long drive along the water and listen to Toni Morrison’s book Getting to Happy. The book is thought provoking and witty and worth the read. Since listening to this book, the idea of evaluating my life by how I am not living has really struck a chord with me.

When you live a life of busyness each and every day as I do, it is hard to wade through the daily muck of life and get to happy—it’s not that I am not happy. It’s just that there are a lot of other things that I would rather be doing than what I am doing, both professionally and personally.

Sometimes it is the case that it is easier to determine what we want by recognizing what we don’t want. Even something as simple as choosing a meal from a menu, it is easier to decide what we don’t feel like having and narrow our choices. Such is with life. I think we often find ourselves in situations, relationships, jobs, cities, etc. that we don’t like but aren’t quite sure how to get to what we want.

Start by taking some time to use Morrison’s theory: evaluate how you are not living to hopefully get to happy.

Jill Personius

What If?

2011-03-30T16:27:00.000-07:00

What and If are two words as non-threatening as words can be. But put them together side-by-side and they have the power to haunt you for the rest of your life: What if? What if? What if?

How many of us have lived with this phrase in our minds and our hearts regardless of the subject matter. I know I have often wondered what if I had……Regret is a terrible thing to live with and something I encourage you not to give in to. You need only the courage to follow your heart.

I challenge you to make a list of things that you have always wanted to do—a bucket list, if you will. For instance, I have always wanted to play the piano. While I might not master the piano the same I would have had I started at a younger age, I am still playing the piano! For some strange reason we have it in our minds that once we hit a certain age we are too old to take lessons or learn something that we should have learned when we were younger. One of the greatest joys of coaching is to watch the burdens be lifted from my clients as I suggest to them it isn’t too late to start!

Think of the “what if’s” in your life and exercise the courage to do something about it. Don’t let another day, month or year pass without attempting to fulfill some of your dreams. Whether it sorts out as planned or not, just knowing you no longer have to live with What if? is worth the doing.

7/7/7 Are you Brave or are you Crazy? With Judy Hoberman

2011-03-23T07:45:00.000-07:00

Are You Crazy....or Just The Bravest Person??

I have been asked this question so many times and the truth of the matter is, sometimes I’m not sure. My entire career has been as a self-employed entrepreneur. I have been in the Sales arena for almost 30 years and that in itself is craziness. My thought was always that there is no room for failure and my outcome was totally dependent on me. I knew I had great work ethics and I always travel the high road so that added to my persona. People knew they could not only count on me but they could trust me.

I started a great career in Insurance in the 90’s. It was a time of change. Everyone was looking at managed care, translation welcome to the HMO’s and I lived in the HMO capital of the world. I came into this industry not knowing a thing about insurance and when I left I was training others about it so it does go in a full circle.

Being self-employed, I always knew that my success or failure was entirely up to me. As I mentioned earlier, failure was not an option. I had two children to support and they relied on me. My team viewed me as a leader and they too relied on me. So my fate was already set in stone. I learned what I could from the resources available to me but many things I had to figure out as I went along. As I advanced through the ranks, I took those lessons that I valued and brought them with me. The ones that served absolutely no purpose, other than never using them again, did not. I prided myself with being fair but expecting a lot....because I knew what the opportunity was.

A decade later, I was asked to take on a Corporate position with the home office to help build a training department. The truth was we had about 200 offices and everything was being taught 200 different ways. There was no consistency anywhere. The only thing that was consistent was the inconsistency and that was the truth. A few months later, the Product Training Department was in full swing. Everyone was amazed that not only was the field on the same page, the home office was as well. It was a win-win situation for all.

Of course, there was still a problem. My expertise was not being utilized. I was a salesperson at heart and was told not to do any sales training. I found myself blurting sales tips out here and there and finally was asked to build a Sales Training Department and all was good. During the next year or so, the non-existent sales training became one of the most positive pieces of the Company. There was an internal University, sales training materials and an advanced training class that everyone wanted to attend. Again, life was good....or so I thought.

Our Company, like so many other Health Insurance Companies, was feeling the pinch of Health Care Reform. There were massive layoffs and most everyone was doing the job of two or three. You could feel the tension and if anyone from HR even walked through the hall, you would swear the Angel of Death was approaching. It was not the most exhilarating atmosphere, but we all did our best to be positive and nothing other than that was ever translated to the field agents or leaders, no matter how close you were to them.

My Sales Training Department was huge...translation, it was me. I knew I could be on the list of those to be promoted out of their position and I was prepared. The training I built could go forward easily without much more than a hiccup. Don’t think you are indispensable because no one is. I was prepared. I asked on numerous occasions if I was on the next “list” but was told, my name had not appeared on any list. I was prepared.

At this point, I knew I was starting to shut down. I wasn’t sure what the outcome would be but I loved the field so much and didn’t want to abandon them. I was them. I did what they do. They trusted me. I was stability for them in these uncertain times. But I was also not being fair to me. I had to decide what was Phase III or IV or V for me. It was time to start over again.

I gave my resignation to the SVP and then to the VP. They were not happy and wanted to figure out a way to encourage me to stay. It wasn’t the money. It isn’t always about the money. But in this economy, money does speak volumes. It was time and no matter what they would have or could have come up with for me, I was finished and needed to go. Of course my notice spanned over 8 weeks but that is a different story and that is how my blog began. I was walking away from a lucrative position and going to....? I didn’t have a real plan, only an idea but that was enough for me for now. I needed to move on and so I did.

The moral of the story is that there is life and success after a life changing experience. I am living proof. I have never felt so good or have had the opportunity to meet so many amazing people as I have now. My friends in the field are still my friends. It only took them a minute or two to realize it wasn’t about them, it was about me. So many people tell me I am the bravest person that there is. I’m not, I just did what worked for me. No more no less.

If I had to give you seven ideas about BEing Courageous they would be:

• Know Yourself-no one knows you or understands you the way you do

• Explore Options-there isn’t just one idea or concept that you are good at

• Be Prepared-for as many things as possible whether financially or emotionally

• Be Open to all possibilities-when one door closes another one opens

• Take Care of Yourself-you might believe everyone else will, but you need to first and foremost

• Travel the High Road-don’t compromise on your integrity or reputation-you only get one shot

• Be a little Crazy-it sets you apart from the rest of the world

So was I crazy or brave? I think a little of both. It takes a little craziness to be braze and lot of braveness to be crazy. That’s what makes the world go ‘round. Remember, you are not alone in this crazy world. Others will seek you out and tell you that you changed their lives and you didn’t even know it. That’s a different kind of crazy...the best kind.

Let's Connect!

Selling in a Skirt's Facebook Fan Page

How do you want people to remember you?

2011-03-22T15:05:00.001-07:00

My Aunt Barbara died this week, which touched me deeper in my core than I had anticipated. Not only was I struck with sadness and tears, but her death provoked me to think about the life she lived and what she offered to others. Barbara was a wonderfully fun woman, who was relaxed and seemed to take life in stride. She had a lot of class, loved children and potato chips. She was nurturing, loved gardening and stayed married to the same man for 61 years! She also gave me my long-time nickname of Jilly Bean, which has now been thankfully shortened to Jilly!

As I read her obituary, which is often the only written account of our lives, I wondered what I might want mine to say. How do I want people to remember me?

In these busy times where we are running from thing to thing—whether it be for personal and/or professional reasons—I doubt we'd want our obituaries to read, "She drove a great looking SUV, fed her kids dinner in the car in between work and soccer practice, worked out…." You get the picture. I think all of us are striving for significance in some way, yet might be missing the mark. It all depends on what your definition of significance is.

In my coaching practice, I am meeting more and more women who want to figure out their life purpose and how to make their mark. I often suggest an exercise to help get them started. List the people you admire and why. If you do this, it helps you get to the core of how you want to make your mark. By looking at the characteristics of those you admire, you will see how and what you most want to contribute to yourself, family, community, and society.

So, how do you want people to remember you?

Jill Personius

"Can Busyness Be Laziness?"

2011-03-14T14:35:00.000-07:00

A good friend of mine recently wrote an article about a quote she had once heard, “busyness is laziness”. The two seem very incongruent. A lazy person is often depicted as someone who accomplishes very little and lies around watching television and taking naps, and we often characterize a busy person as someone who is accomplished- a go-getter or a doer. So how can busyness be laziness?

The explanation for this remark makes sense: Busyness means filling your life up with a million little things, none of which get you to where you want to be. This type of “plowing through life” masquerades as productivity, but is really ineffectiveness. Busyness is laziness because it is easy to just let “demands” control your day, but it’s much more difficult to take time to plan strategic effort thoughtfully … to stop and plan your day and weed out what doesn’t need to be done in order to only focus on what is most important. I have realized that busyness CAN BE laziness.

While we might enjoy being busy, there is something to be said for not having a full agenda all the time, especially one filled with things that are not a priority to us. One of my favorite quotes comes from Sue Bender, a writer who studies the Amish community. She agrees that busyness is laziness, she just says it differently:

Lists engulf us, creating the illusion that our lives are full.

What could you take away from your list that might make a difference today?

Jill Personius

Libby Libby Libby on the Label Label Label

2011-03-14T07:22:00.000-07:00

Ode to the 1970's

Then there was me: Libby.

Until I was probably 15 or so I had NEVER met or heard of anyone else named Libby. Not a person at least. From the earliest time I can remember I was taunted with "Libby Libby Libby on the Label Label Label" which as it turns out was a popular marketing campaign used by Libby's canned good (you know: Libby's Pumpkin Pie Filling?) in the early 1970's. Problem was the campaign was long gone by the time I was old enough to be aware of it so for years I truly thought my neighbor Chuck Crouch had made it up and had managed to share the song with EVERYONE I ran into. This harassment was a terrible thing to endure and needless to say I came to hate my name.

This one thing however was not enough on it's own. Add to it two other things:

My sister's names are Lauren and Lisa--both beautiful names. And legend has it that when my parents told my sisters what they were naming me they BEGGED them to not name me Libby. They voted for Leslie. But my parents were determined.

In addition is the fact that anytime I told someone my name I got "oh nice to meet you Debby/Lidya/Liddy/Wendy/Luby" and then I would have to simply tell them "no it's LIBBY" at the top of my lungs. I would get these sad little looks of "oh you poor thing who named you Libby?"

I went through a stage when I was 7 to about um...18 where I would tell people my name was Jean (my middle name), Elizabeth (a likely explanation as some Elizabeth's go by Libby it turned out, although I had no idea why someone would shorten such a beautiful name to such an awful name) and there was one chapter where I would tell people my name was Cassandra (I have no idea where that came from but I was only like 7 when I used this name).

In college I remember making a phone call to some guy for work. His roommate answered and said the guy I needed to speak with was not there but could he take a message? I told him my name and he said "oh what a pretty name". Me? A pretty name? Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!

Later when the guy called me he said "can I speak to Lidya?" Ugh.

I am not sure at what age this conversation with my parents happened but in my mind I am about 20. Around the snack bar at my parents house I said "why did you name me Libby? It is the worst name ever!" My dad's feelings were hurt. I could see it on his face. He said to me "Your name is beautiful"

I never complained again.

As an adult I have had friends say to me "You ARE Libby. That is the perfect name for you". I have noticed more and more parents calling their little girls "Libby" and it warms my heart.

I know my name will never make the top 10 list of most popular names and that's OK. I don't want it to. Why would I?

My name is sticky. It is simple and unexpected for my generation. People remember my name because it is memorable.

Professionally the lesson is this: when it comes time to name something think long and hard about what you name your business, your product, your service so that people remember it. I spend a lot of time carefully thinking about what to name things so that they DON'T sound like everyone else.

A great example are law firms, accounting firms and architecture firms. The typical line of thinking is to take the partners names and create a combination of letters so you get AMP and Partners, HKS, MNO, YSM etc. Wow! Why in the world would anyone do this? It is what everyone does and you can't be like everyone else. You have to differentiate yourself from the crowd, be memorable.

Do you think anyone forgets Gwyenth Paltrow's daughter Apple? No. Yeah it may be a strange name but in her preschool class filled with Madison's and Bailey's and Addison's there won't be another Apple in the room.

A company that really gets this concept in how they name their product is OPI nail polish. Take a look at some of their best nail color names:

Over the Taupe                            I'm Fondue of You             Louvre Me, Louvre Me Not

Teal the Cows Come Home        Mad as a Hatter                  Curry Up, Don't Be Late

Bling Dynasty                             Tickle my France-y           Baquette Me Not

They understand that the act of naming is powerful. And no this doesn't apply just to "fun" things like nail polish. The same thinking goes to everything we name!

Maybe a rose by any other name would smell as sweet but in the business world and the world of great ideas a name can make or break whether or not people buy/adopt/accept the idea/product/service!

Please apply to your future naming endeavors--kids, products, services, the name of your business. Names matter!

7/7/7 What I learned speaking at Ignite Dallas

2011-03-11T10:37:00.000-08:00

A few weeks back I was in the speaker line up of Ignite Dallas. What a great time. We had topics from the myths of being a red head to the a prisoner entrepreneur program (fascinating). I spoke on how individuals and organizations can find their Plan BE.

If you are not already familiar with the Ignite Concept--speakers have five minutes to speak with slides and their slides automatically change on their own. So, you have to be ready. The concept is brilliant. In the same way that Twitter demands you tell your story in 140 characters, Ignite asks you to enlighten the audience but make it quick.

As a professional speaker and someone who trains others to do great presentations too this formula really benefited me in a new, fresh, innovative way. It forced me to practice one of my golden rules of speaking "Simplicity Rules"

What did I learn? Here are SEVEN things I took away from the experience

Loquacious NO! Simple YES!

Like everything in life there is often a wide chasm between knowing and doing. The actual PRACTICE of simplicity is challenging for everyone. Even Me. The Ignite concept forced me to whittle away, like a woodworker with a piece of wood, to the very essence of my message.

Slide Design is as important as your message

Your Slides are as important as your message. You may not like this but it is the reality of today's presentations. Audiences often want, expect and need a visual reference point for the presentation. People who can deliver beautiful, smart, clever and relevant slides can do this. Unfortunately, a lot of the slides that night were not as high quality as they could be. It takes a lot of practice to get to where you can create slides that deliver. (I will share my slides in my next post so come back and take a look)

Social Media Rules--even in presentations

I have noticed this year that I am watching events like the Superbowl, the Oscars, and other big events while following twitter online. With the right hashtag a conversation flows through the presentation. Ignite embraces social media, namely twitter, and one of the most fun aspects of the event was the twitterific stream of comments, feedback and insight about each speaker. I was so pleased to have people tweet "Tell your fear to suck it" was my favorite line of the night for example.

Be Prepared for the Technology to fail you--always

The first lecture I taught at UNT 1000 years ago--my power point would not open. My teaching assistant who was running the technology panicked but in that moment I made a decision that "that's that so let's just move forward". You MUST be prepared to speak even when your technology fails you. In the case of my Ignite presentation--my slide timing was off and several of my slides literally moved after less than 10 seconds. I could see it happening out of my peripheral vision but I never responded or reacted. A meltdown is not an option.

Ideas spread and move people when they are face to face with them

There is nothing more powerful than a presentation. If you grew up going to church like I did, and you had the opportunity to see an amazing preacher who could electrify an audience (versus the ones I grew up with who put me to sleep each week) you understand the power of presentation. I suspect that in 2011 if Martin Luther King wanted to reach an audience he would STILL use the presentation as his message vehicle.

Everyone has a story to share

My friend Jill asked me no less than 10 times "why would someone do this?" My answer to her (and you if you are wondering) is that people want to share their story.

Igniters are probably early adopters

The reason I really dig Ignite is because I suspect the audience consists of early adopters when it comes to ideas, products, social media, technology, books, events etc. I love early adopters and try to surround myself with them because they make me smarter.

My goal is to be in a constant state of learning and my Ignite experience was a perfect fit for this philosophy. I learned a lot and now I am a little bit smarter. Hooray!

In my next blog post I will share my interview with smart guy Mike Merrill who started Ignite Dallas as well as my slides and presentation from Ignite.

Enjoy your weekend!

“I had forgotten to put myself on the list.” -Wynona Judd

2011-03-09T10:41:00.000-08:00

If you have read People magazine anytime in the last decade, you know that Wynona Judd has had her fill of trials in her life. In a recent interview with Oprah, Wynona attributed several of her issues with weight and self-esteem to something very simple yet very important.

She forgot to put herself on the list.

As Wynona began to think more about herself or what others thought about her, she began to little by little make the necessary changes in her life. So many times, we think that putting ourselves first is wrong or even sinful, but in reality, to a certain extent, it is critical to remaining healthy and well-balanced.

Women in particular tend to stretch themselves too thin, often putting our needs far down the list from our husbands, children, school, work, neighbors, parents…and anything else that can come before us. After awhile, the words “burned out” come to mind and we are now in a crisis situation.

In my coaching practice, I see so many women that are in need of life balance and have more and more regret as each day passes that they are not doing with their life what they have dreamed of doing. Now we all know that life doesn’t work out exactly according to our plans, but we do have more control over it than we think we do.

This week, I challenge you to go back to a previous month in your calendar. Take out a green pen and circle all of the items in your calendar that are a priority to you. With a red pen, circle all the items that you did. Now go back and look at the items that are circled in green and red. Those circles indicate the amount of time you are living out your priorities. The items circled in red are those items that you put ahead of your priorities. Those items circled in green indicate how much time you are spending away from your priorities.

It is a simple but profound exercise to help you begin to “put yourself back on the list.”

Jill Personius

7/7/7: Time for a Presentation Paradigm Shift starting today

2011-03-07T11:40:00.000-08:00

I am in the business of presentations--giving presentations and teaching professionals to design and deliver presentations that get them a round of applause because they didn't bore their audience to death.

Let's be honest: most business presentation suck. (don't tell my kids I said suck because they get in trouble for using this word!) But they do. So many of them are afterthoughts. A great deal of time goes into other message mediums like your marketing materials, website but how much time is spent designing a beautiful, awe inspiring, jaw dropping, put up your phone because you are paying attention to the speaker kind of presentation? Chances are very little.

What we need is a Presentation Paradigm Shift--a PPS if you will. And below are SEVEN ways to shift the paradigm on how you think about presentations today.

A GREAT presentation is THE MOST POWERFUL marketing tool available.

In our frenetic, fast paced, information overloaded business culture, face to face, high touch exchanges are few and far between. Likewise the up and down the street cold calling practices of yesteryear won't cut it anymore. You simply don't have time. Knowing that, a presentation allows you to get face to face with A LOT of people at one time and show them you are human and three dimensional in a way that a website, twitter account, facebook page or you tube video could never do. Using Presentations in your message arsenal is a way to create contrast from everyone else!

A presentation is the real deal
You can hire someone to design a great website. You can assemble a team of marketing gurus so make you look good on paper. You can employ a gaggle of social media savvy people to drive your social media marketing presence. But a presentation is about YOU. In an age of highly cynical people (don't you wonder when you read a tweet from a high profile person if it is in fact them or a paid lackey to tweet for them all day?) a presentation is the way to SHOW people that you are smart, easy to talk to, funny, engaging and more!

Everything YOU do is a presentation

When you choose your outfit in the morning you are making a presentation.
When you attend the networking luncheon for executives in your community and introduce yourself you are making a presentation. Why oh why would you not invest the time to learn to be a great presenter?

No matter your industry, your presentation skills will define how people see you
Gone are the days that being a _____________ is good enough. Architect, Engineer, Attorney, Human Resources Manager, Banker, Doctor--all of these professions are driven by how well the individual communicates. If you currently shy away from presentations, don't encourage your employees to speak at conferences, or provide training for yourself and your team then know this: people will interpret that to mean that you are not well rounded.

You will get overshadowed by the people in your field who are investing time and effort in presentations.
The men and women who speak at industry conferences will get the attention.
The organizations who provide product and service training for the clients are the ones who will come after your clients and win them. The goal of everyone in their industry today should be this: WE ARE THE THOUGHT LEADERS! You want and need your clients and future clients to turn to you when they have a question that falls into your area of expertise. But how do you do this? One way is by GIVING PRESENTATIONS that position you as the smartest group out there on your given areas of expertise. And know this: if you don't do it, your competition will (and may already be) do it.

A Great Presentation creates an energy that no other message medium can
If you grew up going to church on Sunday like I did you probably have seen the potential of a great sermon to sway people. A really great Preacher can actually change the current of our thinking and motivate us to do better in the coming week. And the formula is rinse and repeat every week. When the message is good we are happy to come back for more because a GREAT message stirs us. There is a collective experience that happens that can sometimes rival the feeling you get at a rock concert! A business presentation can tap into the same emotions as any other kind of presentation. We are all in the job of sales and a presentation sells ideas. A great presentation means people will buy those ideas and give you the credit for exposing them to the idea.

Finally, when you do a Great Presentation people perceive you as being smarter than the average bear
Fair or not, there is compelling research that shows audiences believe a great speaker is smarter than an average or poor speaker. This may not be the case (political history is overflowing with examples!) but we believe that well spoken = smart. And in my experience that has in fact often played out to be true. In the reverse when someone is a poor speaker people perceive them to be less credible and sometimes even incompetent. Ouch? Yes. But there is hope--you are not BORN a great speaker. It takes time, commitment, patience and persistence to develop a speaking style that moves people.

If you are ready for a paradigm shift I hope these seven reasons compel you to embrace the possibilities of presentations. Stop avoiding, denying or bombing! Take the time to develop a presentation that makes people listen and you will reap the rewards!

7/7/7 Series: Meet Debbie Gore and BE Inspired

2011-03-03T09:04:00.000-08:00

I invited my friend, Debbie Gore--author of "Recipe for Life", chef and motivational speaker to be the first guest blogger for our 7/7/7 series. If you don't know Debbie already then you should. Her resume is impressive indeed: fashion buyer for Fortune 500 companies including Dillard’s Department Stores, A Pea in the Pod and Viacom Entertainment – then as a chef, managing culinary schools and serving as Director of Culinary Services for Turbochef, an international high tech oven company, but what I love about her is her smarts, her sass and her positive approach to life. Her insightful 7 ideas on BE'ing and Staying Inspired are a great read and I hope you enjoy.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

1. STAY INSPIRED BY FINDING THE RIGHT PEOPLE TO HANG WITH:

I am inspired by serendipity! This starts with an innate sense of knowing whether a person should be in your “business realm”. So what does that mean? I truly believe a connection with another person starts as a “this feels like a mutually beneficial relationship.” That means, that the two of you share something…ethics, values, philosophies, and above all the belief that you want to help one another become successful. It could lead to a greater friendship, but on the onset, the relationship feels good in your head, heart and gut. This is someone you will know for a long time. This is a person with whom you are willing to share ideas, meet with for strategizing and include this person in your business “discoveries.” When you look back on this relationship, there was a natural “connection” from the get- go. Sounds odd, but it is there and real and you cannot exactly explain why.

2. INSPIRATION HAS A FUNNY WAY OF SHOWING UP RIGHT ON TIME

Inspiration is a feeling like bada bing bada boom…things are working and happening in the right way and on time! By “staying in the moment” and recognizing when an opportunity is “right”, not forced, is a learned talent. It is a feeling of recognizing where to go, when to go, and when there are forks in the road. This “tuning in” and “listening for” the right answers will guide you down the highway of life.

3. INSPIRATION FLOURISHES WHEN WE ARE BALANCED

Next, I am inspired by keeping my life balanced. I know the adrenaline rushes that accompanied many years of my career life and have found that although exhilarating, balance is better. Once I realized procrastination meant I had to give up time with family, a work-out or give up my getting centered meditation time, I realized it is better just to keep the balance. Plan your day the night before, get the right amount of rest, eat right and exercise. The days become balanced, focused and overall healthier.

4. A TO DO LIST WILL NOT DIMINISH THOSE MOMENTS OF CREATIVITY AND MOTIVATION

I am inspired by my to-do list having my pleasurable goals as well as my career and home-life goals. It is the old carrot trick: I can have this if I do this. The carrot keeps me motivated.

5. ENERGY SUCKERS ARE THE ENEMY OF INSPIRATION

Inspiration comes from eliminating your vampires or energy-suckers. These can be people, habits and patterns that keep you from achieving goals. If you left the earth tomorrow, what would you be remembered for? Don’t allow vampires to rob you of your legacy.

6. INSPIRATION NEEDS EYE AND EAR CANDY

Inspiration comes from “eye and ear candy” and keeping your finger on the pulse. See new places, attend events, network with strangers, go on vacation, see movies and shop new stores. Listen to inspiration from motivational books and programs. Inspiration is there waiting to be absorbed. Don’t worry about it being related to what you do, inspiration comes in all sizes and forms. Be open to it!

7. ADVICE IS WELCOME

Take advice for inspiration. If someone has “been there done that” or even if they haven’t, listen. Take what you can apply to your industry and test the waters. Let those that have dipped their toe in-tell you whether they jumped in head-first. Keep the things you want and pass on what works to others as generously as was given to you.

Stay inspired, BE inspired, live inspired!

Debbie Gore

http://www.recipeforlife.biz/

-----------------------------------

After reading Debbie's blog post I had a few questions for her I will share with you below:

1. What three words best describe you?

passionate, curious, caring

2. What is the last book you read?

Evolve Your Brain by Joe Dispenza

3. If you could have a superpower what would it be?

To see the future would be nice and arrange things to surprise and amaze people so it turns out better than expected!

4. Who inspires you?

My husband inspires me. We tend to read the same books, discuss them and grow together and stay connected daily. He is always positive, optimistic and is my cheerleader!

5. If you could spend ONE DAY doing anything what would it be?

I love places filled with complete strangers. SO if there were a way to attend an outdoor event on a sunny day that was comprised of all of the components of what I love: food, wine, people, music and some eye candy to look at --like art, travel, book displays...I would be in heaven. I would walk around with Dave and we would chat with complete strangers to learn more about what makes us all tick!

What is a Life Coach?

2011-03-01T22:07:00.000-08:00

Three years ago, I realized my friends and family were spending a lot of time in my comfy red chair telling me their problems, issues, challenges and unrealized dreams. After years in corporate America, I was ready for a new adventure and that red chair was my inspiration.

For those of you who might not know exactly what I do, much like a coach of sport, I provide all my clients with the framework, feedback and accountability they need to break through personal and professional boundaries that are holding them back from being their best selves. I challenge them to ask hard questions and face reality so they can transform and live a life of purpose and joy!

Thanks for being one of my “cheerleaders” as I grow and develop my coaching practice.

As always, your referrals are appreciated.

Jill Personius

Seven Seven & Seven

2011-03-01T15:22:00.000-08:00

It's March! Un-BE-lievable!

How quickly the first two months have flown by in 2011. This month I am introducing a fun series--Seven Seven & Seven.

Seven guest bloggers who will share seven great ideas about their success that you can read in about seven minutes. I hope you enjoy reading their insights about what they do, why they do it and how you can benefit from their successes (and a few failures too).

I am looking forward to learning some new things myself because for me it is all about getting smarter everyday! Enjoy reading. Our first post from Recipe for Life founder Debbie Gore will post on Thursday. She is sharing her "recipe" for staying inspired. I know you will love reading and getting to know her better.

Have a great March 1st!

FOUR People I would follow into the desert...and not worry about getting thirsty

2011-02-23T08:41:00.000-08:00

Who would you follow into the desert and not worry that you would go thirsty? As a communication superhero one of my superpower gifts is to point people in the direction of resources that will make them smarter, faster, better at what they do.

Everyone needs to have their list of people that they turn to for inspiration, motivation and knowledge and today I will share with you my list o'four. (Feel free to share YOUR list with me in return right here Bravo CC facebook

I love smart people. I really love smart + funny. The people that I follow & pay attention to as if my life depended on it are a collection of forward thinking, truth telling, rule breaking trailblazers. Allow me to introduce you....

Seth Godin
Seth is probably one of the most well known marketing smarty pants out there (I hate the word guru so let's roll with smarty pants here). If you want to meet him for the first time I suggest you begin with Linchpin--the best of all his books. From there you can work your way back all the way to Purple Cow. You should follow him on facebook too. Just click here: Seth Godin Facebook but don't look for him on Twitter--he doesn't tweet. His blog posts are short, sweet and highly applicable.

Nancy Duarte
If you are going to generate ideas (and you must in order to be successful) then you need to know Nancy Duarte. Presentation Building Powerhouse, Nancy's two books Slide:ology & Resonate are my Old Testament and New Testament for Presentation Design. Check out her lovely website here: Duarte Design

Danielle LaPorte
I dig Danielle because she TELLS THE TRUTH and that is a rare find these days. She cuts through all the crap and gets to the heart of any issue. Her website White Hot Truth if funky, fun and relevant. Her story resonates for anyone who has decided to go it alone in their business, is a woman and has made a commitment to be there when the school bell rings or has failed and gotten back up and put their boxing gloves back on for another round. She is a force for "the good".

Malcolm Gladwell
If there is someone who never fails to amaze me with his insights it is the brilliant Malcolm Gladwell. Malcolm has a loyal cult following of people and I am one of them. He gives new meaning to the term "geek sheik" and his unruly hair and look is a nice parallel to his mind bending ideas about ideas. Best known for "The Tipping Point" and "Outliers", Malcolm is like no one else out there and I highly encourage you to get to know his work. You should follow him here as a starter Malcolm Gladwell Blog

In your own search to be smarter I submit these four honest to goodness smart people. Please feel free to share your list with me in return and we will help each other!

Always work to BE Smarter!

When you say "The Now Revolution" I am guessing you mean right now?

2011-02-22T15:49:00.000-08:00

As a parent I am continually frustrated that I have to tell my kids "I meant now". I think my directives imply NOW but I am starting to think all they hear is Charlie Brown Phone.

The same can be said for some clients. As a consultant my job is to come in, diagnose the problem and provide a remedy and get on outta there (no I don't try to prolong the job as many consultants are accused of doing!) What is mind numbing is that very rarely does the root source of the problem get fixed and that comes down to an issue of Culture.

The Online community of smart kids is all abuzz about Jay Baer and Amber Nasland's new book "The NOW Revolution" and by now they actually mean right now. Not next week, not later, not in a few years--NOW.

There are a lot of great things about the book but what stood out to me is the most fundamental aspect of the book--you can't "do" social media right if your culture "ain't right" to begin with. Those very basic, cornerstone issues of "this is who we are, this is where we have been, this is where we are going, this is how we are going to get there and this is who is going with us" are often missing from the smallest to the largest of organizations.

Why? Because it takes work to manage your culture (and by manage I mean take care of, nurture, and love-- not manufacture). Baer and Nasland make a compelling case to start with your culture first before you move forward with a social media program. If you don't heed their advice I am certain your efforts will be for naught.

A few years ago I did a survey for a client to ask some temperature gauging questions of their employees. In this nearly 100 employee firm the question "where do you see us in a year?" and "where do you see us in ten years?" resulted in well...100 different answers. Why? Because the vision of the organization was not making it's way down the rank and file. The partners had no intention of opening an office in Singapore but one guy in his cubicle had gum drop visions of opening an office in Singapore so he let his imagination get the best of him. And that is what happens--you have 100 people playing from their own play book because no one "told the story" of who we are throughout the organization.

More importantly, the only people driving this vision were those at the top. This is the makings for a whole different revolution. People at every level of an organization need to have a role in articulating the vision for the organization. People want to be a part of something bigger than themselves and because our work lives take up most of our lives it only makes sense that where we work is where would like to make the difference!

As you are looking to expand your bookshelf let me recommend that you make "The NOW Revolution" your next purchase. AND....download it if you can. Reading it on your kindle or ipad will prove to be a great experience. There are lots and lots of very cool Microsoft tags throughout and make it more experience than book.

You aren't ready for a social media presence if you can't describe/define/deliver culture. You have to know who you are! The NOW Revolution is already underway. And like anything else it is way cooler to get on board earlier than later. Don't be the guy who is the last one to adopt. Viva la Revolution!

Keep reading and BE Smarter!

Dumbfounded: the things people are still saying in corporate America in 2011

2011-02-21T12:23:00.000-08:00

Within minutes of making my acquaintance you will probably pick up on the fact that I am outspoken and don't hesitate to call people out when they are being racist/sexist/homophobic. And yet, on occasion I have had people say things to me that make my mouth drop open wide because I am truly dumbfounded. I think "are you talkin' to me?"

I have had a client tell me "don't mind her she just has PMS" (Did he miss the fact that I am in fact a woman and might not take kindly to this?)
I have had a business associate use a racial pejorative in front of me to which I replied "oh no you did not just say that"
I have had someone tell me they would not be friend someone on facebook because they are gay.

When these things are said to me I can't help but look around to make sure that I was not somehow transported back to the 1950's without my knowledge. But no, everything is in technicolor and it is indeed 2011. How oh how do these attitudes persist? And why? What good does it do to continue to use simplifications to characterize one group or the other so that we don't have to squarely face the reality that in fact "they" may be more like us than we realize?

I am not alone in these experiences. I was shocked and awed recently when a friend told me her organization joked they had reached their necessary quota of female executives (a mere 20% when you do the math). And it was said in front of a group that included a woman! Are you kidding me?

Time to evolve!

I am not calling for us to tighten up and be more politically correct. Political correctness is just a front, a smokescreen behind which people hide their true mean spirited-ness toward the "other". I am asking instead that if you are one of those people who are living in a time gone by that you catch up and get with the program.

We are not one dimensional. My femaleness is one part of me. Someone's race is just one dimension of them and another person's sexuality is just ONE part of who they are. We are all multi dimensional. For goodness sakes, remember that next time you think you are still in the stone ages. You aren't!

In the end,
BE Kinder
BE Gentler
BE Considerate

Have a great week,

The REAL Dirty B Word? BALANCE

2011-02-17T10:35:00.000-08:00

If I hear one word from women about how they want to change their life it is this dirty little word called BALANCE

Never have I ever come across a man who said to me "Libby I just wish I had more balance in my life" (and then I embrace him and we weep together over this missing piece in his life). No! It simply does not happen. So where along the way did women start using this word as a self identifier to describe the state of their lives? I believe it is a direct result from being told as growing girls that we can have it all baby if we just work hard enough. Can you imagine if we could measure and quantify the damage the "I can bring home the bacon and fry it up in the pan" commercials did to girls living through the 1970's and 80's? I mean I REMEMBER the song. And I remember the commercial. And I did not have to discern it's meaning. The meaning was clear. I can do it all!

But I can't.

And I would be willing to bet you can't either. Because we can't have it all. It is in that truth I think comes the opportunity to redefine this dirty word (and the redefinition of a word is incredibly incredibly powerful and possibly life changing).

My girlfriend Jamie is a yoga enthusiast/teacher/practicer/believer and I love her. She is one of the most laid back people I have ever known. She loves life but at a slow and easy pace. She can articulate what she loves in life and she pursues those loves. I suspect on many levels her life is in fact quite balanced and from a distance I would guess that part of that is because she doesn't talk about balance. It does not allude her. It is her. Because she has chosen it. Does that mean chaos never enters her world? No. But I think no matter her conditions at the moment, she is balanced. Does that resonate? I hope so. Balance is a choice. It isn't something you go to Walmart and buy and it isn't something that you have to wait for. You choose it.

Occasionally she will post new pictures to her face book account and I want to share one with you today. She is in "full stretch" to the sky and to me it is a celebration of life, being still, being her, being connected to herself.

It is a beautiful counter image to the unattainable myth of "achieving" balance in our lives. Life is frenetic, hectic, sometimes overwhelming but there is no rule or law that prohibits us from ever stopping, no matter where we are and being in a state of full stretch.

Redefine this word for yourself and CHOOSE to BE Balanced. It is after all your choice.

I see the forest but I don't see the trees.

2011-02-08T16:12:00.000-08:00

It is easy to get wrapped up in your message to the point that you no longer SEE the point or understand it.

If you feel like you aren't getting anywhere fast in your business growth or people aren't buying what you are selling it might be time to hire an outside consultant to help you re-imagine your message. Here are some signs that you need someone:
1. You are defensive. If someone brings a new idea to the table and you instantly reject it: you are defensive.
2. If you have an us versus them mentality you need an intervention. When your message does not resonate with your intended audience is it because you have already characterized them as the enemy?
3. You haven't altered or changed your marketing and presentation content in the last 12 months. Look--things change and your message needs to reflect that. I am not suggesting you get away from the core of who you are but you need to refresh your message to reconnect to your audience.
4. Your marketing and presentations look exactly like your competition you are in trouble.

Evolve or die. It's a simple message that carries a big punch.

A Bravo CC Shamon to the Best Commercials from Superbowl 2011

2011-02-07T11:27:00.000-08:00

With the crazy winter storm behind us, Dallas moved on to Superbowl Sunday and let me say I give last night's Superbowl two thumbs up. You know I love a great commercial. Today I am handing out five Bravo CC Shout out Awards to commercials in the following categories:

1. Most laugh out loud funny
2. Most inspiring
3. Most likely to get me to act (buy their product, visit their website)
4. Biggest epic fail

AND

5. Best in show: the all around winner.

So let's get started.

Most laugh out loud funny goes to: I don't know what in the world this has to do with tires, but the Bridgestone "Reply All" commercial had me laughing out loud. We have all experienced that blood drain from our face moment when we realize we hit reply all.

The next award is most inspiring and it goes to Chrysler and "Imported from Detroit" with local town bad boy Eminem. Loved it. I don't like Chrysler or Eminem and yet I loved this commercial. Strange how that works...

Now the most likely to make me act goes to Living Social. I actually went to their website and signed up for the email specials this morning when I revisited this little diddy. The commercial is laugh out loud funny and I suspect their advertising team high fived when they got to work this morning basking in the glow of NOT being the advertising team for their competition Groupon.

There are some hits, there are some misses. Of all the commercials last night the one that just didn't work for me was the highly touted and buzzed about commercial from Best Buy featuring the unlikely duo of Ozzy and Justin Bieber. On paper I am sure it looked good but it didn't translate and gets my award for epic fail.

Last is Best in Show. Drum roll Please.....Volkswagen does Darth Vader. This commercial was making it's way across face book in the days leading up to the Bowl but it didn't diminish my enthusiasm. It captures the experience of being a kid and my friends with boys really loved it. I loved it too.

So that's it sports fans. I am sure you have your favorites too. Enjoy the week

BE Remarkable: The Power of the Flash Mob

2011-02-03T07:40:00.000-08:00

Flash Mobs are one of the newest and coolest phenomenon around. My dream is to be in one (although I am a terrible dancer) or be witness to one. There is something so joyful, alive and real about these momentary respites from the hum drum of our everyday life that a few of them have actually brought tears to my eyes. There is something so human about them and I love it.

I love a great musical and I suppose it is the flash mob that comes closest to the experience of a musical when people break out in song and dance for no reason at all. It is a real life musical.

So if your inbox or status update on facebook has not featured a video link to a flash mob then today is your lucky day! But first, what is a flash mob you ask?

Good question. A flash mob is:
"a large group of people who gather at a public location to perform a pre-defined action, typically a brief dance, and disperse rapidly after the event has concluded.an internet phenomenon of the 21st century. Although Flash Mobs don’t happen online, they are organized using social media, viral emails, or websites in general. Consequently, the first ‘official’ gathering of this nature was attempted in Manhatten in May 2003, the early days of social media. The phenomenon has since spread across the globe and Flash Mobs are open to anyone to join." (see http://www.makeuseof.com/tag/flash-mob-participate-examples/ for more information)

Before I reveal to you the "big so what?" of the flash mob take a look at a few of my favorites here:

Did you notice the onlookers in these scenes? Many are taking pictures, calling people, shooting video on their phone. Some are dancing along. And they are smiling! How can you not be infected by this joy that the dancers are experiencing. The very idea that they are moving in time together is just too much for me.

These are just three. If you want more (you know you want more!) then take a look here: More Flash Mobs on Mashable!

If one of our goals is to stand out and be remarkable (for the right reasons!) then a flash mob is something highly unusual to the everyday person. How many of you have been caught in a flash mob? Few I doubt. In fact if you look closely you will see that many of the more high profile flash mobs happened outside of the United States.

To be remarkable you have to break people's expectations. Their patterns must be upset in some way for the better. People are on auto pilot moving from one meeting to the next, hurried all the time and plugged into our cell phones as if by an invisible umbilical cord. The flash mob says turn it all off for a few minutes and let's remember the joy of singing and dancing together.

Bravo!

Leaders/Public Speaking/Power Point: A Powerful Combination when used correctly

2011-02-02T11:42:00.000-08:00

I was cruising the aisles of the business section at Barnes and Noble yesterday in search of new alluring book titles and came across a book on leadership and presentations that looked interesting. I opened it up to the table of contents and noticed a section on PowerPoint so I turned to the page indicated where I read "how many of you have ever left a presentation and said 'Wow he/she has a great PowerPoint!'? No one right?" The writer went on to suggest that great leaders don't need Power Point for a great presentation. That may be true in some cases. But to then make the assumption that no one has ever been moved by a great Power Point? Well, I respectfully disagree.

Slides in a presentation have the ability to create a visual experience that a stand alone speaker could never achieve no matter how amazing her language choices might be. That is just the truth of the matter. Millie and I recognize the place of our slides--to provide visual impact to our message--and we design them accordingly. On many occasions our workshop and presentation attendees have commented on how great our slides were and well, I humbly agree. We work HARD at it. Millie has spent an hour on one slide before trying to strike just the right tone with the slide and I can't count the endless hours we have spent looking for just the right image. Why?

Because seeing is powerful.

Because the research is conclusive: people are more likely to remember a message when all their senses are employed.

Because audiences want a multi sensory experience.

Because audiences have a shorter attention span and are more likely to zone out without something to look at.

Because Because Because

Slides are not bad.

The people who design them are usually bad at designing slides.

If you have never left a presentation and said "Her Power Point rocked" you would certainly know it when one did in fact, well, rock. It would make an impact. You would sit up and take notice.

Slides are not going to go away.

People are going to keep using Power Point.

And we are glad for it, because it allows us to work with our clients to help them design slides that, well Rock.

I have a few slides here to illustrate my point. Could you do a better job with words to tell the story that the image so nicely tells on it's own? Take the toy soldiers for example. It is just the perfect representation of the idea we wanted to communicate and for our audience the image is a throwback to their days as kids playing in the backyard with their little toy soldiers. Without it, we might have said "You know it's like when you had all those little toy soldiers you used to play with when you were little..." and it might have gotten a few smiles but the IMAGE is way more powerful isn't it?

I shall not throw the book under the bus I read because I did not read the whole thing and I suspect there is probably some great advice inside the book. But suggesting that great leaders who are great speakers don't use Power Point or Slides in their presentations is just flat out wrong.

Just ask Steve Jobs.....

When "I am proud of you" resonates

2011-01-21T11:20:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I received an 8 item email from my friend and colleague Lauren Cleveland (with Envision Works--not a shameless plug because I feel no shame in saying it) and item number 8 read:

"I'm Proud of You"

In the moment it did not mean much. It made me smile. I thought "oh that's nice" and I moved on to the next item on my growing to do list.

Later that afternoon I treated myself to an afternoon cocktail of anxiety, despair, questioning myself and frustration, on the rocks of course. On the edge of tears because things are not falling into place the way I need them to in my grand time line item number 8 came back to me:

"I'm Proud of You"

Five words.

Five words that resonated with me in that moment when I needed to be told by another human being they were proud of me. Little ol' me. And it changed my attitude, my outlook and my trajectory. I was headed toward an evening that followed my cocktail with a pity party dinner for one but instead I reminded myself of why I am doing what I am doing. I am doing it because it is what I was born to do. It is what matters to me. And others may not see it, or get it, or turn out for it but that is their loss not mine.

The takeaway is simple: tell people you are proud of them. Don't take it for granted that they know.

Cheers.

My first 2011 Goal: Disconnect to Reconnect

2011-01-08T10:37:00.000-08:00

This afternoon an alarm will sound on my phone at 5:00pm reading

"disconnect and reconnect" from 5 to 8

And this alarm will sound every weekday.

One thing I know for sure is that we are all way too connected these days--technologically speaking that is. For Christmas I got the new (and loverly) iPhone 4 and a new iPad. My 11 year old got the new nook color (Very cool) and our nine year old, after waiting 10000000 years got a phone (now she can keep up with all her business clients, scheduled appointments and voice mails--oh wait she's nine.)

And yes these devices rock our faces off. But at some point like all good things we have to draw a perimeter around those things that just beg to be abused. And we need to use a bold black marker to draw the lines.

My bold black marker is my phone alarm. It will serve as a reminder that daily I need to stop and reconnect to my family. No phone. No computer. No iPad.

If your Plan BE for 2011 is to BE connected consider how important it will be for you to disconnect so you can reconnect.

Cheers to the new year and cheers to you.

It's 2011: find YOUR three words

2011-01-01T15:31:00.000-08:00

Quick! You have 30 seconds to tell someone the essence of who you are. What will you say?

In workshops and keynotes I use an activity called "Find YOUR three words". Participants are asked to choose the three words that capture who they are.

The power of this activity lies not in just telling others who you are in three words but serves as a reminder to yourself as well.

My three words are:
Educator
Liberator
Entertainer

Knowing your three words can help you to engage in goal setting and the annual resolution making. Are your goals staying true to who you are? Does your personal and professional life give you numerous opportunities to shine and manifest the strengths that lie in your three words? If not, what can you do to create new opportunities for yourself that will let you?

Take the time to find your three words, write them down somewhere that you will see, put them on your next business card order and come back to them daily, weekly, monthly to stay on track.

What a year! What's YOUR Plan Be in 2010

2010-12-31T08:30:00.000-08:00

The CoServ Electric Guide to Employee Engagement

2010-10-14T18:54:00.000-07:00

At yesterday's Dallas Women's Conference one of the keynotes was on employee engagement. What a great term for talking about what organizations SHOULD be doing but aren't. Why? Because it takes time, commitment, effort and long term vision. I have had many bad experiences with clients trying to lead them to the river to drink. But they dig their heels in and plug their ears like a four year old saying "I don't hear you. I don't hear you" They simply don't get the concept of employee engagement. So does anyone get it? Yes. Read on if you are curious.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
My job is to help my client communicate better. Usually this takes the form of public speaking and presentation training and from there I often get the chance to come back and do interpersonal skills training, leadership and management training, team building and organizational communication training too. I love what I do.

For the last three years I have had the privilege to work with CoServ Electric, a client that is literally a hop skip and jump from where I live in little ol' Corinth TX. They are a a consultant's dream client. I don't have to hassle, beg, plead or grovel for them to get what I do. They already get "it" and everyday they live that out.

We often read about organizations like Google, Southwest Airlines and Starbucks whose business model is employees first, customers second and shareholders third. We think to ourselves "yeah that's great and everything but that's those guys. We can't operate that way". Well you can. And I know it. Because I see it everytime I visit Co Serv.

Below are my own personal observations for why they are successful. These things collectively make for a great place to work. I have worked with approximately 100 people in their organization across every job and department and I have NEVER heard one person complain about the company, their boss, their team members or their job. Let me re-iterate. NEVER. As in NEVER EVER.

1. It all starts with the leadership of the organization. At CoServ the leadership does not pay lip service to things like training and development, employement appreciation and other "soft" aspects of running a company. The T&D program is extensive and EVERYONE has access to it. I have had line men in my public speaking workshops. Linemen. I will never forget Dennis Engelke, the Director of Employee Relations tell me this: we know that one day some of these linemen are going to move into management positions. If we do give the T&D they need to be leaders NOW then we are setting them up for failure. Are you kidding me? So few companies think this way. They may TALK about it. But at CoServ they actually do it.

2. EVERYONE in the organization can tell the "CoServ Story". This is rare. In my experience people at the top of the food chain can be trusted to go out into the community and "sell" their company but at CoServ everyone can do it. I would trust any of them to be out in the community representing CoServ.

3. True Believers. This one piggy backs the above but at CoServ there are a number of true believers. They are drinking the Kool Aid. Heck I am drinking the Kool Aid. But seriously. Dennis Engelke, who I mentioned earlier is one of the best cheerleaders for what CoServ is doing I have ever seen. Hi is highly committed to the success of CoServ employees and he does it with quiet charm. Sometimes with consultants the shiny luster starts to wear off for a client after a while. But at CoServ I always feel warmly welcomed and Dennis is the reason for that. He treats me with respect. He engages me. And he always returns my emails in a timely manner (amazing!) He does this because he is "living the CoServ Brand"

4. Smart, Fun and Creative ways to serve their employees. Every time I go for a visit I learn about something new that they do at CoServ to reward hard work. For example, there is a program called "Living the CoServ Brand". It goes like this. If an employee sees another employee doing something nice they can nominate them for the "Livng the CoServ Brand" award. That person receives a gift card as a way of saying thanks for walking the walk. One example I was given was a CoServ employee who saw another team member pulled over on the side of I35 helping someone change a flat tire. So they nominated this person. So simple. So easy and SO effective.

5. Last is this: through the CoServ Foundation they give money to a number of charitable organizations throughout our community. I could write a book here about the things I have seen and been told but I will share just one. I took Dennis' grant writing workshop earlier this year mainly for fun. On the second day of the workshop they awarded a grant check to two sisters there in the workshop for an after school math program they started in Lewisville. These sisters had come to the workshop the year before and from that workshop they wrote their grant, applied to the CoServ Foundation and I was fortunate to see them receive their big ol check (literally big check. They do the big check. I have always wanted one of those).

Look--my point is this. When I go around and do workshops and teach professionals and organizations how to do it right CoServ is my example. If they could package what they are doing and sell it they could make a bundle. But really it is pretty simple. They put their people first because they know and understand that when you do that it means your customers and shareholders will ultimately benefit. They don't treat their people like cogs in the system. Imagine that--so revolutionary.

But everyday I come across people who just refuse to operate from this place. It is all "bottom line" this and "return on investment" that and "these people should be glad they have a job". And that just skims the surface of things I have been told. I recently lost a potential new (big!) client because the decision makers at the top of the food chain (a food industry company) said employee training and development does not impact the bottom line. It won't get more patrons into their restaurants. How short sighted! Ultimately I walk away because I am not an evangelist. I want clients who already get it but need help from an outside source to show them how to do it. If you don't get it in the first place well I am probably not a good fit for your organization.

If you are struggling to get it in your own organization take their lead. I don't think it matters what industry you work in, what business model you operate from--the formula is this: put your employees first and the rest will follow.

Stevie Wonder, the Eagles, My aunt Debbie and a Greyhound Bus, Music is my memory sense...and the best advertisers know it.

2010-09-20T06:50:00.000-07:00

I have always been told that smell is our memory sense and while a cup of oatmeal can transport me back to the Children's Development Center on Slide Road in Lubbock TX, 1977 the truth is that for me music is my memory sense.

When I am out running, listening to my ipod I take an actual journey to times past. I think that is why we are so connected to music--yes it may be great music but often it is because of how that music makes us FEEL. I remember:
1. Driving to pre school in the morning hearing "Sir Duke" by Stevie Wonder and "New Kid in Town" by the Eagles on the radio. I cannot hear these two songs without remembering those mornings in my mom's car
2. Listening to the Carpenter's and Captain and Tennile at my Aunt Debbie's apartment when I was a wee little one. When I hear this music I can see my Aunt Debbie, see her hands, see her apartment.
3. Any song from the Thriller album and I am transported to my childhood room back when we played music on RECORD PLAYERS (remember those?) and imagined myself dancing and singing at a Michael Jackson song.
4. The first video I remember seeing on MTV was "People are People so why should it be..." by Depeche Mode. We didn't actually have cable at the time but our next door neighbors did and we could pick up their signal! So the screen was a little fuzzy but I was fascinated by MTV. When I hear this song I see in my mind's eye my sister and I sitting a little too close to the TV to watch these music videos.
5. Anyting by The Clash, Erasure, New Order and yes strangely Randy Travis and I am on a greyhound bus on my way to a debate tournament.

My point is this: music is powerful. The best advertisers know it too. If they can get into our heads with a catchy tune then we may be more inclined to buy and use their product. Here are some of the best and longest running:
1. Mr Clean, Mr Clean....
2. Ricearoni the San Francisco Treat
3. Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow....
4. I am stuck on bandaid cause bandaid's stuck on me....
And my all time favorite
5. My Bologna has a first name it's Oscar, My Bologna has a second name it's Mayer, oh I like to eat it everyday and if you ask me why I'll say, cause Oscar Mayer has a way with B O L O G N A.

Now I am off to work on the a Bravo CC jingle....

Talkin Bout My Generation with Guest Blogger Jake Thompson

2010-06-08T08:32:00.000-07:00

One of the most common retorts I hear from my clients is "these young kids have no work ethic" or some other version like this. It is funny because that has not been my experience. "Those young kids" are certainly a different generation indeed and the ways in which they work and play are different from generations past. Their philosophy of work is different too. It has been my experience that many of "these young kids" are not willing to sell their souls to their jobs. Let's imagine for a moment why that might be? Hmmmmm.....
1. Many of the men and women in the 20 something generation grew up with two working parents. That means they went to day care while mom and dad worked 50 60 70+ hours a week. I think many of today's 20 somethings don't want that for themselves because of the toll it takes on their home life.
2. At the same time this generation grew up seeing organizations become less and less loyal to their employee. Gone are the days of working your 40 years for the same organization and getting a gold watch when you retire. Today's worker will change job 5+ times in their career.
3. With the advances in technology today's 20 something generation looks at getting work accomplished differently. You no longer have to be "in the office" to get work done. Unfortunately many employers still see "face time" as the measuring stick for effort.
4. Finally, I think today's 20 something worker does not live to work, they live to play. Work is a means to an end for for many of them and they are not going to live an unbalanced existence where they have no life outside of work.

We will explore this topic more over the next week or so. In the meantime I thought I would ask a 20 something to give me his thoughts on this. Below are some thoughts from Jake Thompson. Enjoy!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“The man who goes farthest is generally the one who is willing to do and dare. The sure-thing boat never gets far from the shore.” – Dale Carnegie

The one thing I am consistently asked by colleagues and strangers is why I, as a 26-year-old young professional, would I want to tackle the uphill challenge of being a freelance consultant in today’s business world.

The answer can be a long, drawn out explanation that might include things about how my father built his company from the ground up and I feel it is a way I can honor my family’s work history. Or I could share that I think my ADHD prevents me from sitting still in a cubicle all day. Or I could give you any number of creative excuses, but it ultimately came down to this – I wanted to use my God-given abilities in service and accomplish something that truly matters in a way that I felt best suited my abilities.

Here’s are the cliff notes on my journey. I graduated Texas Christian University in 2006 with my bachelor’s degree in Advertising/Public Relations and from the University of Dallas with my MBA in Sports and Entertainment Business in 2008. Throughout college I began interning with a variety of sports organizations; including sports agencies, sports marketing groups, and professional teams. I volunteered at events and took an active role in the industry to learn everything I could. I always thought I wanted to be the next Jerry Maguire and was hell-bent on achieving that goal.

I began to feel the need to start my own sports marketing group after spending 2008 at a newer sports agency where I didn’t see eye-to-eye with how things were handled and felt that the industry was corrupting me as an individual. I was not becoming the man I wanted to be and felt that in order to continue loving the game I had a passion for and to grow in my own personal life, I needed a split from the agent side of sports. The split from the agency led me to create AthElite Marketing.

I began with small graphic design and event planning projects through my personal network. As Bob Beaudine put it best in his book The Power of Who, it was my “WHO” people who helped me get going. After struggling for a few months, one of my former graduate school professors referred me to an entertainment development project in Irving and I eventually signed on as a consultant with the project.

I have spent the last two years working with the city of Irving on their entertainment complex while continuing to build a base of sports-related clients with AthElite. I recently launched another website devoted to non-sports marketing and branding called Stacked.

I am very aware of the looks I get when walking into certain meetings because of my youth and am very conscious of the stigma of my generation. We are “lazy, apathetic about our jobs, impatient, and constantly searching for the next ‘great’ gig.” My generation is perceived to be inexperienced, unwilling to roll up our sleeves and stay late, and on and on and on the list goes.

I will give some of the critics credit – there are members of my generation who fit every stereotype I just listed. But, there are also members of their generation and the generation before them who also fit these stereotypes. We can not all be lumped into the same barrel, just as those in the generation before us, and before them should be stereotyped by my generation. It is all a matter of perspective.

I think the biggest mis perception between generations in the workplace is the way my generation was raised. We have had technology at our fingertips from the time we were young – video games, cell phones, laptops, and now social media. As a whole, society is becoming more and more dependent on the big three as their sole means of information – television, computer, and cell (or smart) phones. We want everything one minute ago and we have become a culture of instant gratification.

My generation is accustomed to all of this information and therefore was raised to work in a different manner than past generations. We do not know any other way.

We do not have to be sitting at a desk from 8-5 to be productive because everything we need is at our fingertips, making us mobile. Physical boundaries do not limit us. All the hustle and bustle, moving from here to there doesn’t mean we are anxious or impatient, it just means we have the freedom to travel – a freedom we try to take advantage of.

Thanks to always-changing technologies, we can still be plugged into our work from anywhere. In fact, I get more work done at the local Starbucks with my headphones on at a corner table than I ever do at my office. There are too many people to socialize with and too many wasted minutes in meetings that do not require my presence.

This new generation is not one of laziness, but of freedom. We work just as hard, we just work differently. Unknown to most, our biggest challenge is not finding motivation to work, but making the opportunity to “unplug” and breathe, away from work.

It is almost impossible to leave your work at the office unless you make a conscious decision to. Every entrepreneur struggles with this. My father was always on the clock with his convenience stores because they were his stores and his responsibilities. My generation struggles with that as well, but in a different way because Blackberries, iPhones, and laptops instantaneously link us to the office, no matter where we are. Even vacations can easily turn into working trips with a simple email. I find myself going crazy if I don’t consciously turn off my computer a night or two a week because I will get home from my office and immediately start doing more work on the couch.

There will always be individuals who prefer to sit at their desk, clock in and clock out of work, then go home. Corporate America needs that to excel. Like many others of my generation, all of this freedom has afforded me the ability to think creatively, outside of the box, and not be limited by four walls, much less the status quo. My parents always encouraged me to try harder, push myself farther and be creative. I am not content in accepting second – in sports, in business, in life. I will fail, it is inevitable. But I know that nothing great has ever been achieved without a struggle and my success and legacy will not be determined by my failures, but in overcoming those failures on my way to success.

Jake Thompson
jake@stacked.pro

AreYouStackedToWin.com
AthEliteMarketing.com

"But I'm just a stay at home mom" and why J-U-S-T is a four letter word

2010-04-27T08:13:00.000-07:00

Bravo is hosting our first What's YOUR Plan BE? women's workshop series next week on identifying your strengths and talents and putting them to work.

We have invited all the women in our network.

Even the "just a stay at home mom"

Julie Airheart, a Bravo cheerleader made some calls last week to women we have invited to see if they can join us on May 6th. I listened in as I happily typed away on my computer. One call she placed was to a "stay at home mom" and the conversation from my end was interesting to listen to. When Julie got off the phone I asked her who she was talking to. It was a personal friend of hers that she had invited. "So does she want to come?"

Julie got a funny look on her face. "Well I think she is interested but she said to me 'why would I come to something like that. I am just a stay at home mom'". Ugh.

I don't do well with people who call themselves "just a stay at home mom"

My friend Blynda Lane has on her facebook info page that her job title is "Manager of Lane Enterprises" I love that ! I have started sharing that with other women I know in my movement of one to convince women that "just a stay at home mom" does not even begin to describe what and who you are.

Women, no matter their job title or professional status are ALL WORKING WOMEN and deserve to take time for themselves to learn, grow, engage and become who they were meant to be. In my 30's I have learned that life is about stages and chapters and while there was a chapter titled "Libby is a stay at home mom" it was one chapter in the adventure of my own life. And the word "JUST" was never on my calling card. I am "just" nothing.

Now my "stay at home mom" chapter of my life was pretty short. I was teaching three lectures a week when Maddie was a year old so I had a beautiful life with "stay at home mom" defining me for the most part but I got "grown up time" for a beautiful 10 hours a week too.

For women who "just a stay at home mom" has been their life for the last 2, 5, 6, 10 or 15 years it is easy for the word JUST to creep into our description of self and suddenly, without intention, we have reduced our worth with such a simple four letter word.

It is this very thing that birthed "What's YOUR plan BE?" at Bravo. We are asking women this year "who do you want to be?" and more importantly "what are you doing to make that happen?"

Even for those who are "just stay at home moms".

Jamie Oliver and the Power of the Presentation

2010-04-20T08:10:00.000-07:00

Everyday millions of dollars are spent on marketing and advertising and yet in so many organizations the power of the presentation is an afterthought. In the last two weeks I have a friend who has been given the task of organizing a group of presentations from people in his company for a convention. The audience for these presentations are their very own clients--an audience that is tenuous at all times. There is no such thing as a customer for life anymore. So one would think that A LOT of time, effort and expertise would be invested in the creation of quality presentations and presenters.

This has not been the case.

It has been the opposite.

High levels of anxiety, frustration and well anger have been felt on the part of the organizer because he has not been given the time or resources to adequately prepare this group. He texted me a few days back and told me I would kill myself if I saw their slides. That is probably a bit of an overstatement but I got his point.

So let it be said:

YOUR PRESENTATION IS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT
MARKETING TOOLS AVAILABLE TO YOU. STOP MESSING IT UP

If you want to see it done right, take 20 minutes of your day and watch Jamie Oliver's TED presentation on his food revolution. Here is what you will find: it is not highly polished or manipulative at all. It is engaging, funny, serious, human. Jamie is totally transparent. His audience shows their appreciation with applause and enthusiasm for his message. Jamie engages all our senses, uses technology to HELP the presentation, not become the presentation. All in all, it is not a perfect presentation and for me that is what actually makes it perfect.

There is much to be learned from Jamie. Take a look:

The myth of the Wonder woman Mommy!

2010-04-15T07:07:00.000-07:00

My FAVORITE superhero is by far Wonder woman! That is certainly because of Linda Carter as Wonder woman on the totally campy series from the 70's. I thought she was so amazingly beautiful and I so wanted to be her! I never got superhero powers (or a nose wiggle that would make things happen either like Samantha on Bewitched) but that does not keep me from trying to achieve superwoman status. At every turn I have to resist trying to be Wonder woman Mommy!

When I look around I see women like me trying to be Wonder woman Mommy! everywhere. And that has inspired today's post.

Why? Well here is what I think:

The number of women to men in the college classroom has now taken a turn. There are more women going to college, more graduating from college, more going to graduate school. Historically male numbered degree programs like engineering, architecture, medicine, accounting and law are seeing a noticeable shift in their numbers too. When our own daughters head to college there will be more degreed women in our country than men and this is going to change the landscape of business life and home life in ways that we (the fully emancipated generation!) cannot imagine.

And yet, despite how well educated women are today and despite how emancipated we are the urge to mother our young is not lost on all these degreed women. When I had my first I was 26 years old with a bachelor's and master's degree. All that hard work on my education and once she arrived I looked at my husband and told him "I will not leave this little person at daycare or with another person. Period". Staying home with my kids was top priority. Blessed with my degrees I was able to teach two days a week for about four hours away on those two days and spend the bulk of my time with my girls. Even today with a 10 and 8 year old I work from home (ok Starbucks) and my goal is "be there when the school bell rings" at the end of the day. I want my kids to have mom at home.

Now, all of this is going somewhere. I promise. Being this highly accessible mom to my kids makes me very prone to feelings that I am supposed to somehow be Wonder woman Mommy! all the time. I think about things I feel certain my mom never gave a thought to when I was young: lining up play dates, having the right snacks at home after school, taking my kids to all the culturally relevant events in our city, worrying over report cards and homework, planning fun and stimulating things for summer. What has happened is that in many ways I (and my peers) have turned the raising of our children into our profession. We are professional child raisers.

Now I have a theory on why this is the case: most of the women I live around are middle class and have degrees or at least went to college. These two things combine to create the Wonder woman Mommy! challenge that so many of us succumb to.

Working or Working at home or Working from home every mother I encounter these days holds herself to a standard that is ultimately debilitating. Now, I am not suggesting that ALL mothers suffer from this Wonder woman Mommy myth OK? Some don't. I don't think my mom did. I don't think she laid in bed at night and wondered if she was screwing up her kids. I think she did the best she could. And her best was good enough. It really was. I never felt like a project to her. She did not manage my social life or invest in my education to the degree that I felt smothered.

With all this being said here is my take on the Wonder woman Mommy myth:

1. We are not doing our kids any favors managing every aspect of their lives. We are already seeing the impact of helicopter parents on kids coming out of college. These kids can't function! They are moving back home with mommy and daddy because no one taught them to be independent.

2. The Wonder woman Mommy is downright afraid of letting her young fail. But there is great character development in failure. We must must must let our kids fail sometimes. And look I am not talking drugs, sex, etc. I am talking our kid leaves their library book at home and cries because she won't get to check out a book so we go back home, search for the stupid book, and drive it back up to school (look I have done this! I am telling myself this as much as anyone else). We need to let our kids see how if feels to sit there in library and not check out a book. I think if we let them learn the consequences of these little failures then maybe the SUPER BIG LIFE ALTERING FAILURES won't happen when they become teenagers and young adults. They learned early what it means to have consequences to their choices.

3. The Wonder woman Mommy believes she must keep her young stimulated at all times. Now, reflect on your formative years. How much of it was spent exploring outside, "free play" with friends, creating your own world in your bedroom or at the park? Our kids are losing out on this necessary and good part of life b/c Superwoman Mommy spends so much time creating their kid's over scheduled lives.

4. The Wonder woman Mommy is afraid of everything and everyone. At some point we have to start giving our kids some space to roam and explore and seek adventure. Statistically speaking the chances of your kid being abducted are low. And if we prepare our kids and make them smart then we can give them some freedom to be out there in the world.

5. The Wonder woman Mommy thinks anything less than perfect is failure. So your kid didn't make straight A's this six weeks. Who cares? and again I ask Who cares? The research and evidence is clear: your child's success in their adult life will not be connected to their GPA or their IQ. Their emotional and social intelligence will play a far larger role in their success. No lie.

These are just a few of the "powers" of the Wonder woman Mommy that leave us actually feeling drained, overwhelmed and well, powerless. This is a touchy subject. Talking about moms and pointing the finger (at myself really more than anyone else). But it is a topic worth talking about. When we try to be Wonder woman Mommy we fall into the trap of letting the sum of our worth rest in our mommyhood and we often make the terrible mistake of holding other women to our Wonder woman Mommy standards.

Of course your thoughts are welcome.

So today, take off the cape for a minute and rest and relax. It might just make you feel powerful.

We hope we made a very BAD impression

2010-04-13T06:26:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago we sent out this postcard

Did it cross your desk? Well if it did, chances are it made a pretty bad impression. Why? Well it wasn’t the message. In fact we rather like the message. "We speak Architect. Do you speak your client's LANGUAGE?" As consultants who work with people on their presentations, we have learned to speak the language of our client. A great example are architects. After five years of working with them one on one in great depth we now can speak their language. Our goal is to do the same with them and teach them to speak their client’s language. (there are very few architects out there designing beautiful spaces for other architects after all).

Back to the postcard. The failure was not in the layout of the postcard. We like the color scheme and the clean lines. Visually the postcard is interesting. Not too much content. But enough to reinforce the opening line on the front of the postcard.

But the postcard was a failure? Why you ask?
Because we printed it on plain ol' vanilla
CARDSTOCK and threw it in the mail. Just to make a point. Our point was this:

ONE SMALL DETAIL CAN MAKE OR
BREAK GETTING THAT NEW CLIENT

If you spend countless hours putting together the most amazing RFQ on the planet but put together the actual presentation at the last minute then there is a good chance you are throwing money away. Our job is to work with you to ask some tough questions about your current presentations in order to make sure your presentation is as good as the work you do. A few questions we will ask you when you work with us:

Do you try and reinvent the wheel every time you do a presentation?
Is there a process for creating the presentation and practicing for the presentation?
Are the right people working on the presentation?
Are the right people giving the presentation?
Do your slides know their place in your presentation?
Do your slides make your presentation better or do they hurt your message?
Do you routinely lose new clients because your competition is beating you in the presentation?

These are just a few of the tough (but ultimately rewarding) questions we ask. We work with you to answer these questions and help you train, coach, prepare and polish your presentations.

Our (intended) mistake was just a little postcard. A presentation could cost you millions.

We followed up our terrible postcard presentation with a letter that read much like this one to make our point. We hope it was made!

Say What you Need to Say....Market to the Problem

2010-04-12T08:33:00.000-07:00

I had my second coaching call this morning with Annetta Wilson. She is pretty good at what she does. I enjoyed our time on the phone. She asked me about the challenges that Bravo is up against right now and as we made our way through them I took fast and furious notes.

It is simply amazing how Annetta can talk about what Bravo does in a way that I simply cannot. I don't have to wonder why. I know why. She is not married to Bravo. She can look at what we do from a distance and provide me with insight into the services Bravo provides in a way that I struggle with. One of the big take aways from our conversation this morning was so simple and elegant and yet profound for me:

"Market to the Problem"

This concept is something that we actually teach in our public speaking workshops. Identify someone's problem and make it go away. Talk to them about SPECIFIC things you can do for them and tell a story about someone who had the same problem and how you solved it. Bravo's problem is we get academic in a hurry and it is something that we must resist at every turn. If someone has a headache they want some Advil. They don't want (or need or have the time for) a long drawn out discussion about why they have a headache. First solve the problem. Then you can talk about why they keep getting the same headache over and over and over again.

The "headaches" we solve? Terrible Presentations, Terrible Slides, Terrible Presenters, Terrible Managers, Terrible Leaders, etc. (And terrible can take many forms--terrible can be inexperience, lack of knowledge, fear, lack of vision, lack of goals, and so on and so forth)

And all these terrible things lose time, money, clients for the business.

So this week Bravo will focus here and beyond on saying what we need to say by marketing to the solution. Thank you Annetta!

Sometimes You Gotta Toot Your Own Horn & the jerks at work

2010-04-07T16:29:00.000-07:00

I am feelin' a little frisky tonight. I had an iced coffee after 4:00 today and watch out everybody! Here's what is on my mind tonight: The jerks at work who don't give you credit for your ideas.

This is one of the most COMMON COMPLAINTS we hear from people that we work with in a one on one context. These are the same people hanging out at the water cooler complaining, posting veiled comments on Facebook about how much they hate someone at work (cheaper than telling a therapist) and walking the halls of their workplace with that glazed over "I sure do hate this place" kind of looks on their faces.

These people are pissed.

They went to college and worked hard to get a degree. They came to work full of great ideas and ready to conquer the world and it never seems to fail that over time this gets beaten out of them. The most reliable way to beat it out of them is by not giving them credit for their great ideas.

With all that being said, maybe it is time to take the matter into our own hands and toot our own horn? Are you with me? Here are a few ideas I am throwing around on this:

Three simple things you should start doing (the catch here is that you have to do them for it to work)
1. The first one is kinda simple--ask the people who are impacted by your idea, program, contribution if they liked or enjoyed what you came up with. A notable example is for those who work in the field of marketing. Marketing people are idea people. Day after day they come to their workplace and try and generate new and creative (think sticky) ideas to help grow the business. These ideas are often a collaboration but the seed for the idea gets planted most often by one person. If that person is you don't continue to get overlooked. Go to the people who are the decision makers and say "Hey how did you like the ________ program/project?" Response "I loved it!" "Good! I wasn't sure you guys would like it but I thought I would put the idea on the table"

Subtle. But effective.

2. Put on your big girl panties and tell the person who is a. failing to give you the credit or b. taking the credit for themselves. This is dramatically more different than my first suggestion isn't it? It requires that you be assertive. Are you familiar with the word assertive? It comes down to how you word something and your tone of voice, nonverbal communication etc. (so that you are not perceived as aggressive) Again, imagine your boss fails to give you credit for your idea on how to pitch the new client. Carefully choose a good time to approach your boss (FACE TO FACE!) and ask for a few minutes of his/her time. Clear your throat and say the following:

"It is important to me that when I have a great idea that we roll with, that I be given some credit for it. This may not even be something you are thinking about and I can understand that. But I want everyone to see that I am committed to the success of the team and this is one way I think that gets communicated"

Being assertive takes practice....(future blog post forthcoming me thinks)

3. Give credit. Here's the deal if you start practicing this principle there is a chance other people will take note and begin to practice this as well. Likewise it provides a nice balance between tooting your own horn for yourself and then for others too. People will see that you notice their contribution. And you don't have to be in a position of power or a decision maker to do this! Anyone can do it. Start looking for people who often get overlooked and praise them for their ideas and contribution.

Now get to tooting. (12 year old boy humor)

Tiger, the press conference, stories of trust and the lesson within

2010-04-05T10:48:00.000-07:00

My husband Mark should have already headed to the airport to catch his 3:30 flight but me thinks he is delaying his departure so he can watch the Tiger Wood's Press Conference. On the different morning shows today a variety of interested observers tried to guess at what kinds of questions Tiger would have to field at said press conference. Um....that is a stretch. I'll betcha a moon pie and rc cola he gets asked about his katrillion marital indiscretions, his relationship to a seedy, steroid giving Canadian doctor and all things inbetween. And then there will be a question or two about how he can get back to winning.

99% of the questions he will be asked in said press conference will come down to this: CREDIBILITY and CHARACTER. (Of which it appears Mr. Woods has very little of). 1% will be about the actual game of golf (and even those will be asked within the context of his complete lack of moral judgment: "How do you play good golf this week after having been reavealed you are a schmuck?" )

And therein lies the lesson. It doesn't matter if you bounce a ball, throw a ball, hit a ball with a stick, run a company, make a product that changes lives, represent your community as an elected official, raise kids, teach kids, or scoop ice cream onto a cone--your credibility and character are the most precious things you have and should be managed at every turn. (Managed not manipulated--those are different)

In the newest issue of SIGolf, Brad Faxon weighs in with "How Woods Can Reclaim His Place in the Game" I imagine Tiger's group of well meaning handlers have asked themselves the same question ad naseum. I envision them at a table throwing out ideas on how to do just that. "How about a televised apology to all the people he has hurt sitting in a row with Tiger behind a lecturn talking about how sorry he is?" That won't be awkward or anything. But it was. Know why? Because you can't manufacture this stuff. Just putting a camera on an apology makes us ALL question your sincerity.

What I found WAY more interesting in this issue of SIGolf was not Brad Faxon's piece but the ad on the inside cover of the magazine from Titleist (you know the other golf ball maker, not Nike--the maker of Tiger's preferred golf ball). I googled the ad to see if anyone had caught the subtle stab at Tiger but found nothing.

The ad features a gaggle of professional players and why they "trust" the titleist ball. The add reads "Stories of Trust at Augusta" (ouch!) I think a clever team of marketing people who are smart, savvy and just knew that the underlying message is: Trust = Character which = Credibility = Not Tiger Woods = We are so stinkin smart because he doesn't use our golf ball. Maybe I am wrong. Maybe I am reading too deep into this one or maybe I am not. I think Titleist knows how important credibility and character are even for guys who hit a little ball for a living. I think they know other people know it too.

At the end of the day every person will make their own call on whether they will let Tiger back into their good graces and even go so far as to root for him when he is on the greens. For me, I won't. As a fan I am done with the man. I don't care if he is the greatest player of all time, etc, etc. He has demonstrated his lack of character in multiple ways and for me that can't be earned back. The lesson for me is to strive for consistency in my own behaviors and to be true to what I believe.

"The measure of a man's character is what he would do if he knew he never would be
found out." Thomas Babington McCauley

Epic Fail and Training and Development

2010-03-22T06:40:00.000-07:00

It is Monday morning and I decided to spend 10 timed minutes on www.failblog.com to get a few laughs before getting down to some work. If you haven't visited this site before take a look. It is worth a few wasted minutes. (But put on a timer, if you don't before you know it 45 minutes have passed you by!)

The same thinking: epic fail can be applied to training and development programs every day at organizations across the universe. The reasons are many, too many for my short and sweet blog post today. So, I am going to focus in on three of the reasons we run into again and again and again. Hopefully by just articulating these three other organizations can avoid the same pitfalls.

#1 There must be "buy in" at every level of the organization for training and development programs

AND signing the check does not count as buy in. Buy in means that decision makers, leaders, managers, team leaders see VALUE in providing training and development. This is evident in their participation, encouraging others to participate, talking about the program outside of isolated training moments etc. People at the bottom of the food chain in an organization take their lead from those above them. If they don't ever see the decision makers participating or talking about training and development, the message is "this is not truly important"

#2 You NEVER graduate

Decision makers, leaders, managers & team leaders are most often the people who need professional training and development THE MOST. Yet, many of these people don't participate. Some of our favorite reasons: "I don't need anymore training and development. By virtue of being in this leadership position that indicates I am already fully developed. I graduated", "Oh yeah that is great stuff ya'll are doing there but I am just way too busy to attend" and my absolute favorite? "I already know all the stuff you teach" The reality is that when the people who work for above excuse makers get in the room with us they ALWAYS ask us "is my manager going to have to go to this workshop?" And then a room full of knowing glances are exchanged among everyone, a few chuckles and if they are feeling really frisky they will SHARE with us the major instances of their leader not acting so great.

#3 Training and Development does NOT happen
in a Vacuum

The last one worth mentioning is that T&D does not happen in a vacuum. Like all good things, these programs must be reinforced all the time. As an outside consulting firm who comes into your organization and works with you and your team, our ability to impact this area is minimal. Participants can keep up with us by way of our website, blog, facebook page etc but that only goes so far. The reinforcement happens on the front lines. Leaders, managers, team leaders, decision makers all play a very important role in the success of a program. We have walked into an office before only to have looks from decision makers that read "what are you guys doing here?" because they have NO IDEA what is happening in the way of T&D efforts. And NEVER EVER NEVER think for a moment that the people who do participate don't know full well that their leaders are NOT PLUGGED in. They know. They tell us.

So, if you are in fact a decision maker in your organization I hope this is a little food for thought for you on this Monday morning. And here's hoping you have no Epic Fails this week.

"How many phone calls have you made today?"

2010-03-04T07:35:00.000-08:00

I met a great person Tuesday at the eWomen lunchon in Euless. Her name is Alicia Hicks and her company is "SellingWoman". Alicia's pedigree is beyond impressive. You can get to know her here: www.dailysalesnugget.com

I love her approach to helping women find their "natural sales woman" inside each and every one of us. It is pretty simple: stop selling.

I am going to put that in all caps:

STOP SELLING

I think women (like me) are often paralyzed by the whole sales game that men seem so adept at playing. I can't count how many times my husband has called me and asked "how many calls have you made today?" To which I answer ZERO. "And before you ask about tomorrow, my answer is ZERO for tomorrow as well". I don't like to cold call. It is painful. I hate it. The person on the other end of the phone hates it. Why then would we subject ourselves to this torturous activity? I am sure that cold calling leads to new sales. I get that. But aren't there other ways we can accomplish this--getting more sales? There has got to be.

Alicia believes (and I do too) that women are natural born sales people. If we accept the premise that sales is about relationship building, who better to accomplish that then women--the sex who is 9 times out of 10 more likely to focus on the dynamics of the relationship. And for us it is a natural strength that we all have.

I think for men it is a game. If potential client does A then you respond with B. If he does C then you close in with D. Yuck! So inauthentic.

Martha Barletta, an expert on how women sell points out that we tend to use different methods she calls Same-Same, Scoop and Gift Exchange to connect. She writes:

"Same-Same is the verbal scanning we do to find similarities with another person. Scoop is the opposite of men’s Put-Down, where we try our hardest to support another person when we sense they might feel badly about something. Gift Exchange is the perfect example of how women communicate in full context in order to build connections. In the middle of a business conversation one woman may say to another, “I love your purse.” The other woman might respond with, “Oh, my sister bought this for me in East Hampton for my birthday in August.” The second woman has just given a gift of information which the first woman can use to establish connections, such as, “Isn’t East Hampton beautiful?” or “My sister always gives me nice gifts too.” Now to men, this is more personal information than they’re comfortable with. They prefer to stick to the facts and features, and avoid the stories and personal details."

That is me in a nutshell.

So what if....(brace yourself for impact) we stopped trying to "play the game" and instead drew on our natural strengths as communicators and relationship builders to make more sales? Hmmmmmm.....that's bordering on revolutionary. I am going to chew on it and revisit this issue. Let me know your thoughts.

We Heart Seth Godin & the Corporate Type who just doesn't get it (or get us)

2010-03-01T11:11:00.000-08:00

I spent part of my time this morning going through my marked up copy of Linchpin, Seth Godin's newest book. I wish I could call him up and personally thank him for writing this book because he has articulated the very essence of what we do at Bravo and why we do it. We make people indispensable. What a relief to have a WORD that encapsulates what WE DO.

We teach our clients to have a great elevator speech prepared and ready for anytime, anyplace, anyone but the truth is Millie and I have both struggled coming up with the perfect explanation for what we do. Sometimes I answer: "We do training and development workshops to help people sharpen their communication skills" but I know that this answer is lacking what I call "the big So WHAT?" So what you improve communication skills? Big deal. Other times I have said "we do soft skills training" because this word SOFT SKILLS had some currency a few years back and I figure if I speak the language of the average everyday corporate type person they will get it.

Sometimes I am cheeky and answer with "We are superheroes fighting the forces of evil that result in bad presentations and bad communication skills" which is kind of fun but still lacks that certain something.

And then along comes Seth (yeah we are on a first name basis in my own mind) and he puts pen to paper (finger to keyboard more likely) and tells me what I am. I wish like heck I could MAKE everyone read this book. I wish even more I could MAKE the people who cross our path and don't get it read this book. But alas I cannot. What I can do though it pull out some of the key things in Linchpin that help explain how we help make people indispensable. I have six pages of notes. I will just pull out a few here today to illustrate my point.

The Only way to succeed is to be
REMARKABLE, to be talked about.

Why this matters to us:
The work we do is all about helping people be REMARKABLE. I heard recently that someone criticized what we do as irrelevant because we don't work in their industry. But the qualities that make someone or some organization remarkable go well beyond industry. REMARKABLE is not about the widget you make but all the things that come along with the purchase of the widget. So you can sell hubcaps, straws, build sky scrapers, windshield wipers or copiers and the elements of what make your service remarkable will be shared across all these examples. Don't get me wrong--you must know your product, you must know your industry, but in the world of remarkable there comes a point where you and your competition reach a threshold on the quality of the product and what separates the good from the great are the things you deliver in addition to the product.

When your organization becomes more human, more remarkable, faster on it’s feet, and more likely to connect directly with customers, it becomes indispensable. The very thing that made your employee a linchpin makes YOU a linchpin. An organization of indispensable people doing important work is remarkable, profitable, and indispensable in and of itself.

That is what we DO! We help people and organizations be MORE HUMAN. The truth is that there are so many layers of interaction that occurs between the organization and the client that are added together to make up how people see you/the organization. Knowing this, we approach our client from the perspective that EVERYONE in the organization AT ALL LEVELS can stand to learn some new things, refine their communication skills and come closer to knowing what their strengths/talents are that will make the organization more human. We also help an organization identify the right people for the right kinds of interaction. Do you hate public speaking and avoid it all cost? OK. We will train you and give you the tools you need to do a competent job when you must get in front of an audience but we also know well enough that if this is NOT your talent then why keep putting you in front of an audience?

What if instead we found the people in the organization who already have a natural talent for public speaking and plug them in to these activities? And it usually turns out that the person who is not so great at public speaking has other talents that are sorely needed in the equation like interacting one on one with the client. This process is where we start to help people become indispensable!

Through training and development and one on one coaching we are able to get the right people doing the right things in the organization to help produce the right outcomes.

The last thing I want to highlight in this post is Seth's great explanation of why people like us bring value to what you do.

There are books and classes that can teach you how to do most of the things discussed in this book. And while many copies are sold and many classes attended, the failure rate is astonishingly high. It’s not because the books and classes aren’t good. It’s because the RESISTANCE [your lizard brain] is stronger.
When the resistance tells you not to listen to something, read something or attend something--GO! DO IT! It’s not an accident that successful people read more books.

All I can say is AMEN and PREACH ON! Our goal is to work with people who are in a constant state of learning. People who ask a lot of questions, challenge the status quo and know that if they don't do these two things the world is going to pass them by. Successful organizations and people must be nimble and quick in today's rapidly changing environment where nothing is guaranteed anymore. Competition if fierce and everyone wants their piece of the pie and heck, they are happy to take your piece too. And people and organizations who are not paying attention often look up and find "holy Moses they took my piece of the pie!" Well yeah....

We like hanging out with people who get the big so what. For us, the big so what is this: being indispensable comes down to relationships and your ability to successfully navigate your way through all the many layers of those relationships. At Bravo CC we help our client do that.

And if you are one of those weird "always learning" kinda people then pick up Seth's book. The few hours it takes you to read it will be time well spent. Now, go be indispensable.

You can learn something new everyday

2010-02-17T07:31:00.000-08:00

If you know me professionally you know that I am very careful to tell my clients and potential clients that I am NOT a motivational speaker. Why? Because I am afraid that if I don't actually motivate you then I have not done my job well! I also resist this term because my experience with motivational speakers have been cheese, cheese and then a little cheese on top of that.

Yesterday Millie and I attended our first eWomen network luncheon in Plano TX. We have been asked to speak at their luncheon in Centerport in March so I thought we would go and experience a luncheon as a participant to get a feel for this organzation. As lunch was getting underway a very attractive woman flew through the door and came and sat at our table, as it was one of the few that had an empty seat left.

We began the "advanced networking" part of the event where you go around the table and each woman has 60 seconds to pitch their business. One thing I really liked about this 60 second opportunity was the question "what do you need to happen in the next 30 days?" Our latecomer to our table went first and as it turns out, this was Sandra Yancey--the mastermind and visionary behind eWomen network. What luck! Not only were we fortunate enough to share lunch with her, she was the guest speaker as well.

During Sandra's presentation I took notes and here are a few of the high notes from what turned out to be a HIGHLY motivational presentation minus the cheese. My notes include:
1. You make the decision to survive in any economy
2. Phenomenal women know what their passion is and find a way to "monetize" it (make a living)
3. It takes a special person to say "I am going to go for it"
4. There is not enough room in the economy today for just good. Great is what is required.
5. When we stay small with our business, we think small and we limit our brilliance.
6. We must learn to let down our guard with other women and stop pretending we have to be doing "great" all the time.
7. Do what you are good at and find other people to do what you aren't great at but they are (this is something Bravo has been emphasizing since working our way through Marcus Buckingham's work).
8. The universe is always on time (halleluiah!)
9. Take stock of who you hang around and put distance between yourself and the dream suckers. (Can I get an amen?)
10. Take inventory of how you spend your time and reclaim "you" time

My favorite quote I wrote down "As an entrepreneur you reach a point where you have to jump off the edge of the cliff and build your wings as you learn to fly"

We all need an ocassional opportunity to refuel our energy tank. Sandra Yancey did that for both Millie and I. In fact, I was convinced to the point of joining eWomen that day. Wow! We met many amazing women who are on the same journey that Bravo is on--Small business working hard to break through. I feel certain that one way we do that is increase our exposure to other successful people. Success breeds success.

As I listened to Sandra's presentation I couldn't help but wonder what Millie was thinking. If you think I am a tough critic, Millie has a way higher standard. And she tolerates no cheese, no cliches, no heavy handed tactics to persuade. We made our way to the car and I asked "what did you think?"

Her reply "I loved it". For me that says a whole lot.

If you don't have a place and time set aside each week or month to spend time around people who build you up and keep you motivated, start looking around for an organization like eWomen or another professional organization where successful people get together share ideas, contacts, and their stories. You won't regret it!

What great leaders know...

2009-11-17T19:28:00.000-08:00

I am not ready to crown myself the greatest leader of all time. And I readily admit that I don't necessarily do this on purpose, but...in his book "The Management Gurus: Lessons from the Best Management Books of all Time" Chris Lauer writes about the importance of generating small wins. And that is something I do.

He writes "leaders should dream big, but start small. Dream big about crossing that enormous cosmos to find some new world but start small with a few short journeys to test your theories and abilities".

I have found myself telling more than one person, on more than one occasion, that I am not trying to conquer the world. Now don't get me wrong here. I have big plans for Bravo but I also know that have those dreams realized it needs to be slow grow. Deliberate, slow, methodical and planned. One project at a time, one client at a time.

I would think for anyone starting a business this would be sage advice.

Why is "generate small wins" important for me? I think one of the reasons that people never go after their dreams is because they think everything has to be perfectly in place in order for them to get started. Not me. I see the first time I do anything--a new workshop, a new presentation, any new idea as a trial run. I have to. If I required perfection I would never get started.

And so I approach everything I do as adding one small win to my win category knowing that in time, those small wins will accumulate and start snowballing into the big wins I lay in bed at night and plan out in my head.

All great stories have a moral and mine is this: if you are keeping from going after your dreams because you think everything should be PERFECT take a deep breath, tell yourself "perfection is not the goal" and then get started.

The Duh Factor

2009-11-13T12:31:00.001-08:00

I sometimes find myself clicking on the Yahoo Home Page snippets about life at work. Today's home page snippet is about bad co-workers. Here are the five things that make you a bad co-worker, according to Yahoo.

1. You dump last-minute work on people when you could have avoided doing so.

2. You complain about people without telling them your beefs directly.

3. You exude negativity.

4. You bring your personal life to the office in ways that make people uncomfortable.

5. You're chronically defensive.

Here's the end to this ENLIGHTENING (sarcasm intended by the all caps) article:

"If you recognize yourself in any of the above habits, you may be the irritating coworker that colleagues are complaining about to me. Try a one-month moratorium on the behavior and see if any of your relationships improve."

Here is the problem: YOU WON'T RECOGNIZE YOURSELF IN ANY OF THESE ITEMS AND THAT IS WHAT MAKES YOU SO **%#@@ IRRITATING. Thus, the DUH factor.

You see, people who do these things are painfully self UNaware. And that is what makes them so hard to work with. I have often joked with clients that we are going to start providing an anonymous service to people where we send emails that say "hey guess what? Everyone thinks you are a royal jerk!" That reminds me of a funny bumper sticker I saw once "Jesus Loves you, Everyone Else Thinks You're an Asshole". Now that is funny.

Maybe I should just buy a bunch of those and hand them out as a service project. It would make the world a better please me thinks.

DUH!

Power Point is not the Devil

2009-11-11T11:26:00.001-08:00

Check out this SlideShare Presentation:

Great Slides

View more presentations from guestbce1265.

I was cruising the aisles of the business section at Barnes and Noble yesterday in search of new alluring book titles and came across a book on leadership and presentations that looked interesting. I opened it up to the table of contents and noticed a section on PowerPoint so I turned to the page indicated where I read "how many of you have ever left a presentation and said 'Wow he/she has a great PowerPoint!'? No one right?" The writer went on to suggest that great leaders don't need Power Point for a great presentation. That may be true in some cases. But to then make the assumption that no one has ever been moved by a great Power Point? Well, I respectfully disagree.

Slides in a presentation have the ability to create a visual experience that a stand alone speaker could never achieve no matter how amazing her language choices might be. That is just the truth of the matter. Millie and I recognize the place of our slides--to provide visual impact to our message--and we design them accordingly. On many occasions our workshop and presentation attendees have commented on how great our slides were and well, I humbly agree. We work HARD at it. Millie has spent an hour on one slide before trying to strike just the right tone with the slide and I can't count the endless hours we have spent looking for just the right image. Why?

Because seeing is powerful.

Because the research is conclusive: people are more likely to remember a message when all their senses are employed.

Because audiences want a multi sensory experience.

Because audiences have a shorter attention span and are more likely to zone out without something to look at.

Because Because Because

Slides are not bad.

The people who design them are usually bad at designing slides.

If you have never left a presentation and said "Her Power Point rocked" you would certainly know it when one did in fact, well, rock. It would make an impact. You would sit up and take notice.

Slides are not going to go away.

People are going to keep using Power Point.

And we are glad for it, because it allows us to work with our clients to help them design slides that, well Rock.

I have a few slides above to illustrate my point. Could you do a better job with words to tell the story that the image so nicely tells on it's own? Take the toy soldiers for example. It is just the perfect representation of the idea we wanted to communicate and for our audience the image is a throwback to their days as kids playing in the backyard with their little toy soldiers. Without it, we might have said "You know it's like when you had all those little toy soldiers you used to play with when you were little..." and it might have gotten a few smiles but the IMAGE is way more powerful isn't it?

I shall not throw the book under the bus I read because I did not read the whole thing and I suspect there is probably some great advice inside the book. But suggesting that great leaders who are great speakers don't use Power Point or Slides in their presentations is just flat out wrong.

Just ask Steve Jobs.....

What ideas are sticky for you?

2009-10-27T16:47:00.000-07:00

We continue our conversation about sticky ideas today by looking a new ad campaign I find sticky. Recently I have found myself not skipping the new Intel commercials. The two we included here are SO sticky. Why?

Well first they are quite simple. "Our Rock Stars aren't like your Rock Stars" and "Our Jokes aren't like your Jokes" is so simple and yet packs a lot of punch. They are also unexpected. When you think Intel what do you think? Well I don't think about clever, funny, imaginative or cutting edge. I think boring technical computer stuff. But this new ad campaign is less than boring.

Next the ads are concrete because they reference things I am already familiar with--rock stars and jokes. I understand those concepts. By suggesting their rock stars and jokes are different from my rock stars and jokes I feel like they are giving me the opportunity to know them better. We share some common ground--we both like rock stars and jokes right?

Finally the commercials tell a good story. The rock star one is a perfect story. We have all seen the crowds of adoring fans waiting for their favorite band to pass by so they can swoon. Only this time, the rock star is the most unlikely fellow we could imagine--Ajay Bahht, co-inventor of the USB. Wow!

So what do you find sticky?

Leave your comments below. To leave a comment simply press on comments.

Are you Sticky?

2009-10-26T10:23:00.000-07:00

In our lunch, learn and LEAD workshop with our friends at VLK this week we are looking in great depth at how to generate sticky ideas for our presentations. I am hoping to get some feedback leading up to Friday that will help us to wrap our head around the concepts of sticky ideas. One of the most profound, yet simple ideas that comes out of Chip and Dan Heath's book "Made to Stick" is "The Curse of Knowledge" heretofore referred to as: CofK. Ok... The CofK concept is pretty elegant in it's description--Once we know something, it is hard to imagine what it was like to not know it. Done. Millie and I have to remember this when teaching presentation and slide design. We have years of experience doing this--most people don't. So we have to carefully construct our messages to fit the experiences of our audience.

Now, if you have ever had to suffer through the pains of helping your little person with multiplication you can understand CofK at work. As an adult, with years of experience multiplying numbers, we have all learned the little tricks that help us to multiple even the most difficult of numbers. Just the other night I was working with my daughter on 7, 8, and 9. I was hoping the pattern that emerges when multiplying with the number 9 would be obvious. You know it right?

9 18 27 36 45 54 63 72 81 90 99 108 117 126 135 144 153 162 171 180

Do you see the pattern?

You probably do.

The number in the ten's place is going up as we climb to 90 and it is going down in the one's place. When we get to 99, we start over again and the tens place goes up one while the one's place goes down one.

But my daughter did not see the pattern on her own.

And this made me frustrated. How could she not see it?

Because I am familiar with the CofK I was good to remember that I probably didn't figure out the pattern on my own either (I'm no rainman mind you) and it is more likley that an adult pointed it out to me. And with that realization I was able to then modify my instruction to her to accommodate for the fact that she does not have the same knowledge base as I do.

So, I am wondering--how does the CofK get in the way of your messages? Consider for example if you work in a highly specialized industry. Do you tend to take for granted that not everyone knows the same things you know? (Computer People can be among the worst! Sorry but it's true!)

Leave your replies below. And good luck conquering the mighty CofK (cue dun dun dun music).

Tomorrow's post will get you thinking about what messages and ideas are sticky to you. Start looking around and considering for example commercials, logos, advertising campaigns, packaging, etc. All of these are places where ideas should be sticky (and often are not!)

Until then, have a great (rainy) Monday

The Cost of Self Delusion

2009-10-13T10:37:00.000-07:00

I am about half way through "What Got you Here Won't Get you there" by Marshall Goldsmith, a pretty good read on how to break some of our worst habits to reach our full potential. There is not, so far, anything revolutionary in his list of bad habits that hold us back but I am always a fan of repetition to reinforce some of those hard learned lessons. I have paused to put down here a great thought from this very book, found on p. 134.

"Your flaws at work don't vanish when you walk through the front door at home"

that is worth typing again

"YOUR FLAWS AT WORK DON'T VANISH WHEN YOU WALK THROUGH THE FRONT DOOR"

I hear people I work with tell me all the time "I am different outside of the work place" and honestly, I have a pretty tough time believing them. The area I struggle most with in my life is organization. I know that about me. Thank goodness I have Millie as my business partner because she helps me with that by 1. being very organized herself and 2. gently reminding me of things I should be paying attention to but have failed to do. "But I am not that way at home". Yeah right.

Goldsmith tells of a Gordon Gekko like character he worked with who was VERY successful financially but a disaster in his professional relationships. Essentially everyone he worked with hated the man. When Goldsmith sat down with him to address this flaw, the guy's response to him was "Oh that is just me at work, I don't act like that at home". So Goldsmith got his wife on the phone who literally burst out laughing at her husbands self delusional statement. I think the word she used was "jerk" to describe him at home. Just for good measure, Goldsmith got his kids on the phone too. And they corroborated her story. OUCH!

My point? Pay attention to the complaints you receive at home, and there is a good chance that those are the very qualities that are holding you back not just in your personal relationships but in your professional relationships too. May Angelou once said "When people show you who they are, believe them". I would add to that--if they show you to be one thing at work, they are likely the same way at home--and vice versa.

Take a week and write down all the comments that people make about you. Even the comments your kids make (ouch!) Write down the good with the bad. At the end of the week, sit down and see if any patterns emerge from the "passing remarks". Then make a plan to do better.

You Gotta Start Em' Early

2009-10-01T06:36:00.000-07:00

My daughter is running for student council today at her school. I don't know if she will win the election as the politics in the 5th grade are just brutal! She asked me to help her prepare her speech and I thought I would share it here to illustrate how I can even apply the principles I teach to a 10 year old's speech to her classmates.

Maddie was a little nervous while she was practicing her speech so I did what I have done for countless other people--I gave her some stage directions. I put them in all capital letters and inside brackets so she would know not to read that out loud! As she practiced her biggest challenge was to not read too fast
(DON’T READ TOO FAST! SLOW) Did you know that a survey I read said people are more scared of giving a speech than of death? Seriously? but I want to run for student council and that means giving a speech.... so here I go.

Maddie had three ideas on why people should vote for her. We used this one as the first because it has the smallest impact. I tried to inject a little humor but who knows with ten year olds if they will laugh at my little attempt at humor. Yeah--I could have told her to just burp really loud--kids love that stuff--but I don't believe in pandering.
(REMEMBER TO MAKE EYE CONTACT)
First of all I think I will do a GREAT job on the maverick morning news. i love watching the news and I think it would be fun to be the newscaster. Have you seen Katie Couric on the TV news? Well I want to be the 5th grade Katie Couric!

(BREATHE, SMILE)
I also like helping other people and I think student council is a great way to serve our school by helping students and people in our community too.

I thought this was the best of Maddie's ideas so we put it last. The idea is a direct connection to the posters she made to hand up around the school. Maddie Spears is Mint and she put packages of spearmint gum all over the poster. It was pretty cute and apparently a hit because all the kids wanted to know if they could have a piece if they vote for her.
The last thing is something I think is a really good idea. Ever wish you could chew gum at school? Well I think we should change twin day to “Double Mint Twin Day”. You would still dress like your friend and be twins but the best part? You get to chew gum in school....ALL DAY LONG! I think that would be really cool.

This was Maddie's idea--I didn't inject a transparent appeal to the audience, she did it herself. You probably have some great ideas too for things we could do at our school. If you vote for me I hope you will tell me your great ideas and I will try and make them happen!

We really struggled here. I had some clever ideas but Maddie vetoed all of them because they were lame and stupid. Her words. So we settled on something pretty simple.
Well I didn’t die huh? My mom said I need a conclusion so here is what I can up with: “If you like a girl with great ideas and want just one day to chew gum at school then vote for Maddie!” (SMILE)

To compliment the speech I made her a T Shirt that says "Vote for Maddie" on the front and "I want to be your DoubleMint Twin" on the back and did black and green to match her gum packets.

Will she win? Who knows. I am more proud that she can get up in front of a crowd and articulate her ideas. She is a pretty great kid and if mom and dad could vote she would be a shoe in. 5th graders are a pretty fickle bunch. But in the end, we had fun working on the posters and speech and win or lose, she is still a great kid.

Chicken Soup is Delicious

2009-09-15T11:29:00.001-07:00

I begin first with an admission: I have never read a Chicken Soup for the Soul book. I love a great inspirational story but here's the deal. When I get those kinds of stories in an email, I tend to dismiss them as made up drivel and find myself saying "Seriously?" or "Give me a break". So, when someone recommended the book "The Success Principles" by co-creator of the the Chicken Soup book series Jack Canfield I thought "Um, pass...." But the glowing review that my acquaintance gave the book challenged me to check it out despite my crankiness toward the whole Chicken Soup series idea.

And yes, as you probably expected--I was wrong to be so stubborn and mean spirited about Mr. Canfield's books. If they are as good as The Success Principles then count me in. (Mental note: Pick up Chicken Soup for the Soul next time I am out and about)

The Success Principles are the nice kick in the butt I needed to finish out the final months of 2009 and stay inspired to continue to deliver quality training and development programs to our current clients, and find new clients who have a need for the services we deliver. I have marked up a lot of the book but the section that really zapped me was his discussion of F E A R. I doubt there is anyone who is not held back in some part of their life because of this little four letter word. In fact, in our public speaking workshops and presentation coaching it is F E A R that limits so many of our participants.

Canfield cleverly refers to fear as FANTASIZED EXPERIENCES APPEARING REAL. And it is our fear that keeps us from truly being successful. So--what is your fear? Mine is rejection. I hate feeling rejected and that keeps me from going out into the world and asking for new business. But I am learning to do it. I love what I do and the only way I can continue is by growing what I've got. And that means asking. And that means getting over my fear.

If your fear is public speaking, confrontation, dealing with your boss, going back to school to pursue your REAL dream, asking that special someone out, telling your kids NO!, finally having that sit down with a distant parent use this short and simple exercise from Canfield's book

I want to ____________, and I scare myself by imagining ______________.

By completing the sentence you are taking away some of the power of your fears. You are taking control for your own destiny by acknowleding that your fear is imagined. Let's say for a moment that your fear is real. Yes--I am going to get rejected by some of the people I ask for their business. But if I re-write my interpretation of these seeming rejections as getting me closer to a YES! then my fear is rendered meaningless.

What is your fear keeping you from?

In Canfield's book he peppers each chapter with some great quotes. My favorite is a fitting close:

"Progress always involves risk; you can't steal second base and keep your foot on first" Frederick Wilcox

A Respectful Distance . . .

2009-08-18T12:56:00.000-07:00

One of the perils of my job is that I could be accused of being a bit of a dork. For instance, one part of my job is to understand and explain how and why people communicate in the ways that they do. One of the ways that people communicate is through their use of space and I'll admit that how people use space is a source of constant fascination to me.

For instance, take the other day when I saw a Dallas police officer who was having a chat with a (rather portly) panhandler in a very busy intersection in Dallas. The officer had pulled his car along the sidewalk and was talking to the panhandler through his passenger window. The panhandler was standing on the far side of the sidewalk (as far away from the police car as possible without leaving the sidewalk) and had positioned himself so that he was almost even with the front tire of the police car. The officer had to lean all the way into the passenger seat and all the way forward just to talk to the guy.

As I sat at the red light watching this interchange, it struck me that the panhandler was using space to lessen the police officer's control of the situation. He was making life just a little bit hard for the cop without being overtly disrespectful.

While I sat there (it was a really long light), the panhandler shuffled up the sidewalk just a bit so that he was pretty much even with the front bumper of the car. At this point, he actually took control of the situation because the cop could not continue the conversation without either leaning completely across the car and out the passenger window or pulling forward. He chose to pull forward and thus surrendered a little bit more of his power to the panhandler.

Clearly, the police officer was still in a one-up position in terms of the power dynamics of the interchange, but the panhandler significantly diminished the officer's power status through nothing more than a shuffle of the feet.

Want the job?

2009-08-12T09:31:00.001-07:00

So I am sitting at Starbucks, again. It really is amazing what we see and hear at this coffee meeting spot. Over the years I have witnessed a number of job interviews take place over a cup of coffee and my little rabbit ears always try and well, eavesdrop on the conversation. Am I nosy? Yes. But that really isn't the reason I pay so much attention to the conversation. I pay attention because I teach this "stuff" and I am always intrigued to listen in on real life interviews. Right now, just to my right, there is an interview happening between two women. I wish I could whisper a few things to the interviewee. One--don't talk so darn much. Yes--you wold think that in an interview you should just talk talk talk talk and then talk some more. You are trying to sell yourself right? But the truth is you need to balance how much talking you do with how much you are listening. You can provide yourself with some listening time with a few well planned questions. Well planned questions do a couple of things. One--it indicates you have done your homework. Two--it allows the other person "shine" a little by telling you what they know.

Now if I could just run her across to the mall and help her put together a knock em' dead interview outfit......

Nose Hair is no small detail

2009-08-10T08:59:00.000-07:00

For those of you that know me personally or professionally you know that I work at Starbucks a lot. Standing in line this morning to order my tall iced coffee with two pumps of vanilla I was confronted by grossness. What kind you ask? The kind involving the nose. And Hair. Nose Hair to be exact. This man, who I am sure is highly adequate in his job, was suffering from an overgrowth of nose hair. Now I try to not judge a book by it's cover but well....I tend to judge a book by it's cover. It's true. If this was not the case, actual book covers themselves would not be so important in determining whether or not the book gets read or not.
According to www.bookmarket.com, the quality of the book cover does indeed make a difference in whether or not we pick up the book and more importantly, buy it. Now let's extend the metaphor shall we? The same can be said for picking a contractor, consultant, doctor, attorney, accountant--well anyone. And our "book cover " if you will is HOW WE LOOK. Personal grooming is a big part of that package. Men--overgrown nose hair is a no no. Giant Cattepillar Eyebrows (a la Bobby Knight) is again, a no no. Don't get me started on ear hair.

Now, if I can find a way to let Mr. Hair Nose know this.....

It's Not Rocket Surgery . . .

2009-08-10T08:43:00.000-07:00

I was driving (really fast, cause that's how I roll) on my way to meet Libby this morning (to work really hard, cause that's . . . well, you know) and I zoomed past a pickup with a logo on it that actually provoked thought! I kid you not! I slowed down and let the pickup catch up with me so I could take a second look.

It wasn't actually the logo that caught my eye, it was the tagline, "Hey, it's not rocket surgery." The company is Logix Communications (a Houston-based firm) that is pretty nondescript as far as I can tell from their website, but their tagline indicates a sense of humor and personality that is just the kind of thing I look for in companies that I patronize. It made such an impression on me that as soon as I got to my office (Starbucks), I opened up my computer and looked them up.

The sad part? I can't find their tagline anywhere on the website. It seems that their marketing/branding strategy is not terribly well integrated. Still, their approach to branding was enough to get them written up in the Bravo blog and, let's be honest, that's a pretty high honor.

-- Millie Shaw

The Importance of getting BUY-in from your people

2009-03-10T10:36:00.000-07:00

I don't watch the mainstream news very often but decided over lunch to turn on CNN newsroom and see what all was going on. Of course 99% of the stories are about the state our economy. Go figure. The state of Virginia was highlighted in a nice story about how they would use their stimulus money ($4 billion) to improve their state. Residents have been asked to offer their ideas on line about how they would use the money. Many requests are purely out of one's own self interests but from the 8,000 submissions Governor Tim Kaine has gotten some great ideas on the direction of their state's future. The struggling college student who has asked for the state to purchase her a car probably won't get what she asked for, but at the same time she has been given a voice to throw in her ideas.

There is something to be learned here. In so many organizations, decisions that affect EVERYONE are made by a select few--those at the top and then implemented from top to bottom without ever considering the impact it will have on those who are affected by the decision. A great example to me are when our elected officials make decisions about public education but don't ask students, teacher, parents, school districts what they would do.

If you have made it to the top of the decision making food chain in your organization, don't dismiss the original and new ideas that others in the organization might have to offer. Likewise, don't underestimate the power of "buy in" for new decisions. If I feel like I had some input on the decision, whether my idea was adopted or not--I am more likely to be on board. Great parents know this. Now...for you cynics don't read into my comment. I am not saying "Make them think we value their ideas and then do what we want anyway". That is manipulative and inauthentic. And people see through that every time. You have to be GENUINELY interested in other people and their ideas.

When everyone is a part of the process then you are going to have an easier time getting buy in. Do you have to get everyone's input on every decision made? No. But judge according to the extent the decision will impact those who follow your lead. If you take the time to just ask yourself this question you will start to have a good idea about when you need to attempt to reach a consensus.

Now off to a family meeting on where we should vacation this summer.....

Language and Airplane Crashes: A Surprising Relationship

2009-01-23T08:00:00.000-08:00

I spent the day yesterday ignoring everyone. I couldn't help myself! I got hooked on a book and couldn't put it down! (Well, I couldn't stop listening to it, as I buy audiobooks so I can safely drive and read at the same time.) The book was Malcolm Gladwell's newest -- Outliers.

Outliers is a book that investigates the unacknowledged and powerful forces that impact the ability of individuals to be successful. Gladwell finds that it isn't simply that a particular person was smarter or worked harder than others. In fact, while being smart and working hard are almost always part of the bargain, Gladwell has found that everything from when you were born, where you grew up, who your parents are, and the subtle (and sometimes not-so-subtle) impact of your culture have a lot to do with your success.

My experience reading Gladwell's work is pure joy with a heavy serving of fascination. How he manages to scare up so many interesting stories and weave the experiences of very different individuals together into a coherent narrative is well beyond me. That's the fascination part. The pure joy comes from seeing how the things that I study and teach (the impact of our communication patterns on our daily lives) play such a significant role in Gladwell's findings.

Take, for instance, the chapter entitled The Ethnic Theory of Plane Crashes. Gladwell's research shows that the problem with Korean Air, an airline with a dismal safety record up until the very late 90s, was not that their pilots were incompetent or their planes were unsafe. The problem was that the ways of communicating in Korean culture that had been passed down from much earlier generations prevented effective problem-solving communication between the captain and flight crew in the cockpit. Korea is a culture in which authority is highly revered. Because of the way the captain and crew related (the crew was expected to take care of the captain during layovers and breaks, even going so far as to cook meals and buy gifts for him), there was very little room for disagreement with the captain's decisions in flight. Gladwell notes that in one instance, a first mate was backhanded by the captain for incorrectly performing a procedure during flight!

Korean Air has turned itself around and is now among the safest airlines. They did this by implementing a new operations strategy that acknowledged the impact of traditional Korean culture and emphasized the importance of language in the relationships of the crew. Language was the key to transforming the culture of the flight crews from one of revered silence resulting in many crashes to respected colleagues who voice their opinions and end up landing safely every time. All Korean Air flight crews now use English (a language that doesn't worry so much about authority and position) in all communication with each other. And, they have explicitly addressed the expectations that are now in place for how pilots and their subordinates should address each other.

Outliers is a book that will motivate you to look beyond the obvious and examine how seemingly unrelated factors can have a significant impact on how you relate with others and the level of success you find in your own life. If for not other reason than that it is chock-full of great stories to tell at cocktail parties, I say that you must read it! I know I'll be using it a lot in my workshops from now on. So, if you'll be sitting in on them, maybe you shouldn't read it, that way all of my stories will be fresh and fun!

-- Millie Shaw

The Stories We Tell

2009-01-20T10:20:00.000-08:00

Just a quick heads-up! We recently posted a presentation on slideshare.net (a great resource for design inspiration and fascinating content), and it was chosen as a featured presentation!! Go Bravo!!

The Stories We Tell

View more presentations or upload your own. (tags: cc bravo)

The Inaugural Address

2009-01-20T07:06:00.000-08:00

Today Barak Obama will be sworn in as the 44th president of the United States of America. Many people, including myself have been waiting for the changing of the guard and I eagerly await watching him be sworn in as well as hearing his inaugural address.

I first saw Obama four years ago when he spoke at the Democratic National Convention. I had no clue who this guy with the funny name was but I knew in my heart that one day he would run for president and possibly even be elected. Little did I know it would be now! I received an email from a former student two weeks ago that said "when you showed us that speech Barak Obama gave at the National Convention, and you said he would be president I guess you knew what you were talking about". That was three years ago. That gave me chill bumps.

As a professional speaking coach, I spend a lot of my time evaluating speakers. One thing I know is that there is a very clear divide between style and substance. Obama has both. It seems that after eight years of Dubya people have become so used to an inarticulate president that some people actually CRITICIZED Obama for his amazing speaking style. Suddenly being a phenomenal speaker was something to be criticized.

So the lesson to be learned here is when we encounter someone in a public speaking setting it is important that we fully take in all the elements of the the occasion. We must evaluate the speaker him/her self and their content. If there is a lack of consistency between what the speaker says and what we know to be true about the speaker, the world, the facts then we have a problem.

Since Richard Nixon's shameful dissent from the presidency Americans have had an understandable problem with politicians. We can all count example after example of elected men and women telling us one thing and doing another. ("I did not have sexual relations with that woman") We have become jaded. Hard. Cynical.

Along comes a man whose message is consistent with his lifestyle. Where are the inconsistencies? I have found none that are substantive. When he says to you and I "I can't do this alone, we must all do it together" I hear the call. I feel proud. I feel American. I believe.

When he says "We aren't red states and blue states, we are the United States of America" I believe. I recognize the truth in the statement. I remember that the media and mean spirited political types have tried to polarize us but I resist their attempts.

When I see a man who is not only married but is partner to his wife, when I see a man who is a devoted father to his daughters, when I see a man holding the hand of his mother in law the night he was elected--I see where style and substance line up next to each other and I tell myself "this is true".

For that reason I am as excited about today's inaugural address as I have ever been about any other "big event". I feel the electricity coming through the television. I feel history in the making. And I am here for it.

We are all here for this day, this event, this moment. America made good on it's promise to one another that equality is more than rhetoric. Barak Obama points the way for all that we can be in our future. I will enjoy watching how the next year unfolds before us as a nation and how our new leader leads us into the next chapter of our nation's story.

The Creative Power of Constraints

2009-01-16T08:00:00.001-08:00

I don't know how this will impact my "professional image", but I have to say -- one of my favorite movies ever is Dumb & Dumber. I think it is one of the wittiest and most innovative movies and it certainly raised the bar for that type of comedy. But, that's not my point.

I watched the director's cut version of it the other day with high hopes of even more insane hilarity and I was very disappointed. Not only was it not any funnier, it actually dragged a little and got on my nerves. Have you ever gone to the special features on a dvd and watched the deleted scenes? I have never seen deleted scenes that I thought should have been left in the movie.

Thank God for editors!! Imagine if every director got to make movies as long as they wanted. We'd be going to 3 or 4 hour movies with about an hour's worth of scenes that would have been better left on the cutting room floor. I don't think I've ever heard someone leaving a movie theater saying, "Gee, I wish it had been a little longer."

Have you ever heard someone leaving a professional presentation who said that, either? When I watch the deleted scenes with director's commentary, I can tell that the directors really think their stuff is great. They don't have the distance and perspective of someone who is not intimately connected to their project. The same holds true for professional presentations -- you can tell that some speakers have put every single thing into their presentation because they think that everything is important. To paraphrase one of my husband's favorite sayings: "When everything's important, nothing's important."

The best speakers can feel passionately about their presentation and, at the same time, put themselves in the position of their audience. They can see the difference between "What's important to me?" and "What do I need to tell my listeners so that they can fully grasp the significance of my topic without being overwhelmed?" This process of thinking like your audience is the same as the editing process for films.

So, the next time you craft a presentation, put yourself in your listeners' seat and edit your content to fit their needs and perspective. And even though it may kill a little piece of your soul to remove some of your PowerPoint slides and information, you'll probably be doing your audience, and yourself, a big favor.

-- Millie Shaw

2009-01-12T16:04:00.000-08:00

Careful the words you choose

A recent meeting with a client led us to a discussion of the word expert. We come across it everyday and when it comes to persuading others--expertise can be a convincing argument right? Millie and I both resist the urge to call ourselves experts in our field because, honestly, we are not sure we qualify for such a lofty title. Expert to me suggests that someone has reached the mountaintop. And while the mountaintop is a great place to be--where else is there to go from there?

Allow a moment to consider my “expertise” as a public speaker and public speaking coach.

First, I was a goofy debate and speech nerd in high school. While my friends spent their weekends (unbeknownest to me) partying and listening to rock and roll music, I was traveling to schools all over Texas debating issues like prison overcrowding, retirement security and space exploration. To make it all the more exciting I also did foreign exptemporaneous speaking where I dazzled a classroom of judges on issues like apartheid in South Africa and nuclear proliferation in the former Soviet Union. Fascinating.

From there I earned a bachelor’s degree in communication studies and a master’s degree in communication studies as well. I peppered it with my PhD program in Information Science where I specialized in instructional communication and design. During that time I started teaching in the college classroom. Over ten years I estimate about 6,000 students have walked through my door and worked with me to become a better communicator.

I can’t count the number of articles I have written on the subject matter and workshops taught to corporate clients on improving their communication skills. If I try to count the books I have read on my subject matter I lose count.

So, I am an expert right?

Well......

No.

I don’t want you to call me an expert because it implies I know it all. And I don’t. Not even close. Do I know a lot more than the average bear? Yes. But that is because I have given my time and attention to this subject matter for a number of years. I have done that because I am passionate and a true believer. I LOVE public speaking. And I LOVE teaching people to be better public speakers and communicators in general.

Every year we get smarter. In 2008 Millie stumbled upon a little book called Zen Presentations and Poof! it forevermore changed the way we approach what we do. We practiced some of Garr Reynolds principles already but with his book we fully embraced a new way of thinking about slide design. From there, Slideology by Nancy Duarte was published and was a nice piggy back to Zen Presentations. Slideology put on the page many of the things that Millie and I knew were right but somehow having Nancy Duarte articulate it in her beautifully designed book suddenly gave us the energy and drive we needed to share it with our clients.

Don’t call me an expert. But you can call me:

A Storyteller

Passionate Teacher

Curious Learner

Engaging Speaker

Which brings us full circle--be careful the words you choose to talk about yourself. If your competition refers to itself as experts then let em’ have the word. Because there are far more interesting words to describe yourself that will have an impact on your audience as well. If someone that we wanted a contract with asked “Are you experts?” my answer might be:

“I hesitate with the word expert because it might imply I am done learning. We are well read, well researched and very well experienced in our field. And we get better at what we do every year. There are things that are always changing in our field too and we stay abreast of those changes so that you get a better quality product from us. Expert? Maybe. But instead we want you to think of us as engaging, curious, teacher, learner, excited and passionate”

Make a list now of the words you would use to describe yourself. How many of them are tired and worn out (the same words that everyone uses to describe themselves qualify in this category) and pin point what you can say about yourself that no one else can say.

If you do this, you will get closer to separating yourself from all the "experts"

2009-01-06T07:48:00.000-08:00

Read The Book!

For me, one of the primary ways I stay smart is through reading books. I thought I would start off Oh Nine! with some recommendations of books I read and throughly enjoyed in 2008 as well as share my list of books to read in the first ninety days of the new year.

This year I read some GREAT books. Here are a few recommendations for your bookshelf.

Brain Rules is a fascinating read about how our brains work and why we do the things we do. For us, it has informed us in our workshops when we talk

about what audiences pay attention to, what they remember and how that impacts presentation design.

For me, this was the best book I read in 2008. The information is relevant, interesting and applicable to what we do everyday--teaching people to communicate their ideas in a way that it sticks to people. The writers are two brothers and the sense of humor they bring to each and every page of the book is what held my interest. There are a number of memorable anecdotes which is a good thing--their book "Made to Stick" is sticky indeed.

What does it mean for a book to revolutionize a field? Presentation Zen by Garr Reynolds has done just that by changing the way people think about slide design. For years we have gotten closer and closer to the principles that Reynolds teaches in this bible of slide design but this book was what really sent us into a new league. If you want your slides to stand out from

the rest, use this as your starting point.

Earlier this year Millie and I found a company called

Duarte Design on the Internet and loved the site. Later in the year, company co-founder, Nancy Duarte published her first book on slide and presentation design, Slide:ology, that has been a great add on to Presentation Zen. We like it so much that we are traveling to California in March for a dynamic duo workshop with her and Garr Reynolds to learn first hand how they approach slide design. We will be sure and follow up on our trip with you about what we learn.

The Next Ninety Days of Reading:

So in my quest to get smarter at what I do, I have made my list for the next ninety days. Here is what I am going to be reading:

This book has been on my list for quite a while now. I am

going to embrace my inner artist-doodler-sketcher person and embrace the principles in this book.

Why do people act irrationally? Good question. Sway examines this very question and poses some interesting ways of thinking about this idea. Using

modern day examples of people who have acted well... irrationally we learn the deep psychological influences that drive these very behaviors.

My final read for the next 90 days is going to be Outliers. By---Yep!

Malcolm Gladwell. I have had a lot of fun watching him show up on my favorite shows like The Colbert Report and reading articles about his new book Outliers. In Outliers Galdwell examines the question why is that some people have exceptional success? Are they themselves exceptional? Or is it simply right place, right time?

What are you reading in the next ninety days? Let us know and we will add it to our list!

Why My Job is So Hard . . .

2008-12-06T03:47:00.000-08:00

It's not just that people hate speaking in public. And most people do.

And it's not that people are immediately turned off when they hear about a new workshop they're required to attend (nothing like 4 hours in a room learning about speeches to really start the day off right!).

It's because of other people who teach public speaking skills and do dumb stuff like (no kidding -- I literally copy and pasted this from a professional speaking coach's blog):

"I use hats as an outline of my presentation. Let's say I was talking to a company about the past, present and future of their marketing. I might use one of those funny ball caps that has a long pony tail attached to it and talk about how when this company first started it was wild and carefree in it's marketing efforts.

I would put this funny cap on or have an audience member volunteer wear it. The humor really starts here and in many cases you don't have to say a word. The audience members may start picking on one of their male buddies who is bald or one of their short haired female colleagues who always wanted long hair."

Who thinks this is a good idea? What bald man out there wants to go to a workshop (on public speaking, no less) and get picked on to wear a stupid hat that a cheesy "public speaking coach" thought would add some visual interest to his presentation?

Puh-leeze.

It reminds me of that 80's movie where Sylvester Stallone saves the world with a strong arm and a backwards hat. Okay, he doesn't save the world, but he does bring an emotionally wrought and remarkably cheesy movie to a rather satisfying end . . .

Brainstorming for Grown-Ups

2008-11-13T11:25:00.000-08:00

Brainstorming is that thing that elementary school kids learn about so that they can develop their creative abilities and learn the value of working in small groups, right?

In my almost 8 years of teaching in the college classroom, I have never met students who either understood how brainstorming works or who were willing to engage in an actual brainstorming session. My findings continue to hold true despite the fact that I now work primarily with highly intelligent people who work in very successful businesses.

My non-scientific assessment of the problem is that many people don't trust that the effort will have sufficient rewards and others simply don't feel comfortable with the kind vulnerability required to throw out seemingly off-the-wall ideas to a group of their peers.

This topic has been on my mind for a while, but the importance of it was really cemented by a brainstorming session that Libby and I had last week when we were preparing a proposal for one of our clients. It was not planned and it happened in a very noisy Starbucks, but it worked.

I then ran across this article by Malcolm Gladwell and found my thoughts coming into focus. Gladwell's article follows dinosaur enthusiast and former high-level Microsoft researcher, Nathan Myhrvold, in his quest to literally generate insight. He's not so much interested in developing new technologies or products, his goal is to think them up. He started a company called Intellectual Ventures, hired the smartest people he knew, and then started having them get together for "invention sessions."

What I found fascinating is that these "invention sessions" are really just brainstorming sessions among remarkably intelligent and accomplished people. Here are a few things about brainstorming sessions that I have gleaned from the article:

1. They are informal sessions with no clear-cut goal: "There really aren't any rules . . . We may start out talking about refined plastics and end up talking about shoes, and that's O.K." These guys meet at the offices of Intellectual Ventures, but they also do things like talking over dinner. Notes Lowell Wood, who was a new member of the team: "We sat there. It was a long dinner. I thought we were lightly chewing the rag. But the next day the attorney comes up with eight single-spaced pages flagging thirty-six different inventions from dinner. Dinner."

2. They are meetings of individuals with a wide array of interest and expertise: A chemist, a neurosurgeon, a physicist, a couple of former Microsoft researchers, an electrical engineer, an attorney -- these are the backgrounds of some of the members of Myhrvold's team.

Gladwell notes, "They had different backgrounds and temperaments and perspectives, and if you gave them something to think about that they did not ordinarily think about—like hurricanes, or jet engines, or metastatic cancer—you were guaranteed a fresh set of eyes."

It's a great idea to get all of your colleagues, who do the same job and think about the same things, together for a brainstorming session. But, just imagine what might come out if you threw in a few wild cards . . .

3. They are the result of a great deal of knowledge and research: Despite the fact that these sessions lack a guiding outcome or structure, they are not simply a spur-of-the-moment occurrence, either. When the group is working on a particular topic or idea, they spend weeks doing research about what is already known and what is thought to be possible. They bring their informed opinions to the meetings and use them to build new ideas. This is how synergy happens.

It makes me realize that the brainstorming session that Libby and I had about how to structure our new Get Smart program could not have happened even a year ago. At that point, I knew too little about the industries with which we work to really be a good sounding board. I had to know what I was talking about before I could be a really useful brainstorming partner. But, the funny thing is that, every time we do this brainstorming stuff, we come up with something that really works. Or, as Gladwell points out: "Good ideas are out there for anyone with the wit and the will to find them, which is how a group of people can sit down to dinner, put their minds to it, and end up with eight single-spaced pages of ideas."

Practice Makes . . .

2008-10-27T17:09:00.000-07:00

My old high school basketball coach was so darn witty. "Practice doesn't make perfect!" he'd say. "Perfect practice makes perfect!" A saying which elicited many an eyeroll over the years. And yet, as is the case with much advice I got when I was young, it turned out to be right on the money.

In our public speaking workshops, we don't spend much time talking about how to practice your presentations. But, the how is a very important part of your success.

My basketball team was very successful. We won over 100 games in my 4 years of high school (alas, we did not achieve the ultimate -- state champions). We were ranked in the top 5 in the state at some point in every season. What was responsible for that success; other than my own assist and rebound skills? PRACTICE. (My coach's other favorite quote was, "Once you get the fundamentals down, everything else falls into place." ) We didn't just sit on the bleachers talking about what we were going to do when the game started. We ran -- a lot. Up and down the court -- passing, dribbling, free throws, plays. We practiced it all.

It's not as easy to identify the "fundamentals" of speech practice. Truth is, most people practice speeches in the "Everybody Wants to be a Rockstar, but No One Wants to go to Band Practice" way. (Click here for more on that.) We usually practice presentations by saying what we're going to say when we give the speech, rather than actually saying it. That way of practicing often causes us to "drop the ball" when we're in the real game.

To combat ineffective practice and encourage more successful presentation experiences, I constructed a plan for practicing presentations that breaks up the process into 4 definable sessions, with goals for each session. Here is a link to my Four-Day Practice Plan (it's a Millie original, so value it accordingly).

Remember, you don't get points for good intentions and elaborate plans. You only get points when you execute successfully. Practice execution of your brilliant ideas and when you get to the big game with all of the screaming fans, you'll prove my old coach right. Once again.

Blinded by the light . . .

2008-09-30T19:18:00.000-07:00

Or Why loving your message too much can make you a bad communicator

I was going to call this post "I found Jesus in my cappuccino" but I figured that might make some people stop reading.

I was witnessed to the other day. In a Starbucks, no less! I have to give props to the missionaries: two cheery girls who couldn't have been more than 20. I was struck by the sheer fervor of their testimony -- and the bulldog-esque nature of their unwillingness to let go once they had a good bite (I was the bite).

One of my favorite comedians, Jim Gaffigan, does a bit that perfectly illustrates my experience -

"I do want everyone to feel comfortable, that's why I'd like to talk to you about Jesus . . . It doesn't matter if you're religious or not, does anything make you feel more uncomfortable than some stranger goin' 'I'd like to talk to you about Jesus . . .'?"

The other thing that struck me about these girls was how little they seemed to care about me, their audience. It turned out that what they really wanted to do was perform their well-planned litany of reasons to follow Jesus. The fact that I already knew the litany and expressed my irritation at their very intrusive questions concerning my "personal relationship with Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior" had no impact on their message. They were going to say what they had planned, by God!

Everyone has been in a situation like this. Although it may not have been such a spiritual experience, we have all been the victims of a presenter who LOVES their topic and thinks everyone else should LOVE it, too -- the financial adviser who expounds on the state of affairs on Wall Street, the car lover who details the difference between the '72 and '73 corvette, 0r the communication expert who sees every conversation as an invitation for a lecture on how to be an effective communicator. What each of these speakers seems to forget is that no one else is as invested in their topic as they are. They end up turning people off completely, rather than generating interest. They get the exact opposite of what they are seeking.

Oddly enough, the two missionaries would have created a very positive impression with me had they been a bit less passionate about their topic and paid a bit more attention to my responses. I actually had to be mean to get them to leave (and those of you who know me know that, despite my rather surly exterior, I'm really a softie at heart).

It made me realize that if all of us put a little more effort into exploring how our audience might feel, we would probably change a lot about what we say and how we say it. I know I would. It's a good thing that everyone loves communication as much as I do, huh?

-- Millie Shaw

Gender & Sex: The Debate Continues

2008-09-16T08:49:00.000-07:00

I truly hate it when I have to revise my position on a topic like gender and sex. You see for YEARS I taught college students that it was gender: the sociological construction of our masculine or feminine identity that was paramount to all other influences. I was solidly grounded in my belief that nurture trumped nature! Well.....I am not as sure and comfortable in this thinking as I once was. My husband (Mark) and I have two girls who are headed toward adolescence fast and furious. In my attempts to get a handle on this before it happens I picked up the book "The Wonder of Girls" by Michael Gurian, a well published and well respected writer as well as social philosopher, family therapist and all around smart guy.

After I finished this book, I immediately ordered "The Wonder of Boys" to read as well. Now, I don't have sons, but I do have a husband--and I suspected that reading this book would give me insight into how his brain works! A simple issue like "why does Mark (my husband) love to channel surf for long periods of time and it drives me bananas?" Well, Gurian has a simple biological answer for this simple question as well as insight into some of the more complicated issues on how and why we do the things we do.

After I finished both books, I immediately sent an email to friends who are raising kids, friends who are educators and friends who have a pulse--- "READ THESE BOOKS!" It just might help you avoid some of those problems that potentially await you in the future. And save our civilization. OK--that could be a stretch.

Here is the take away from these two books:

1. Boys and Girls (thus men and women) are different biologically. For years, we have ignored the reality of this statement in favor of nurture explanations. Now we have decades of well substantiated research that helps to turn our attention back to the nature of who we are.

2. Moving closer to a balance between nature and nurture to understand who we are is better than a polarized one point of view position (that is as much for me as for anyone else!)

3. The feminist movement and philosophy has done a lot of good. It has taken us only so far though and we need to re-evaluate, redefine and reconsider. (that one is a tough one for me--but after reading Gurian's point of view I have to say I am reconsidering)

4. Our basic nature as men and women do not define our destiny. But, understanding these things (how our brains work, how our hormones work, etc) can allow us to better define our sense of identity and our relationships.

5. Lots of reading, thinking and considering is necessary on our part to fully evolve as men and women. We MUST separate ourselves from the tired and worn out stereotypes that limit us and our relationships.

The content of Gurian's book has caused me to go back and revise my gender in the workplace workshop. That will be the content of my next post: gender at work--moving forward.

To our next president....

2008-09-10T07:54:00.000-07:00

It is election season. Many jaded Americans bemoan this time of year, mostly because the world of politics is ugly, slimy and sometimes downright unethical! Let's hope that the next three months are not as ugly as the last political election.

My daughter has asked me several times when we can go to the White House because she wants to meet and talk with our president. I love the mind of a seven year old--she doesn't understand that you can't just walk up and ring the doorbell. But if you could....here is what I would want to tell the next president:

SPEAK ONLY THE WORDS YOU HAVE WRITTEN YOURSELF

If this were an actual practice we would REALLY see our president for who he (or she...one day, one day) really is. We could all sound presidential I think if we had a team of people writing for us. Can you imagine if our sitting president had to write his own material. I'd betcha that would be a whole different bag of tricks wouldn't you?

One of my favorite shows was The West Wing. Rob Lowe was the president's speech writer and on several episodes we watched him labor to find just the right words for President Bartlett's next important speech. And yes...this fake president was articulate and charismatic as many of our past presidents have been. But he didn't write the speeches! I think a person reveals their intellect in their ability to organize and present their ideas and opinions--and the leader of the free world should be articulate given the thousands of people he or she comes into contact with in any given day or week.

You may not have aspirations to be the next president, governor, senator, mayor or town dog catcher, but everyday you give speeches. Think about it--all our communication is in some way a presentation. Take the time to invest in your ability to translate those amazing thoughts you have into messages that people will respond and react to in a positive way.

Olympic Proportions

2008-08-25T20:34:00.000-07:00

I teach people to be better communicators in a number of contexts. Some of my greatest moments of clarity about how we perform as communicators comes by way of sports. I love sports. I REALLY love when the Olympics come around. This Olympics is no exception. I DVR all of it and then sit and watch with a bowl of ice cream (blackberry cobbler from Blue Bell--yummy!). One of my favorite events is women's gymnastics.

The women's gymnastics team competition at the Olympics provided a great opportunity to look up close at how people perform under pressure. The Chinese women rose to the occasion. (especially for a bunch of 13 year olds! Ha.) The women representing the United States came up short. As I watched these young, incredible talented women I was struck by a few things.

1. The Team effort it takes to win Gold

2. How people respond and react to set backs

"When I say say 'let's go' you say 'team'"

Last night's performance was a team effort. We win together, we lose together. In the case of the women representing the United States, Alicia Sacramone probably cost the team the gold medal. That is a heavy burden to carry. If her parent's happen to read this--I mean no offense. My point is simply this--one person can drop the ball and everyone suffers the consequences. On this day it was Alicia. The same can be said for many of the presentations we see in corporate America today. A team helps design the presentation and very often a team also does the actual presentation. Imagine for a moment there is an imaginary torch that is passed among each team member. If one person fails to pass the torch effectively, it gets dropped (your power point has crazy, unexpected animation; the second guy in the presentation was supposed to speak for 5 minutes and he takes 20 instead; one of the team members does not bother to show up for practice time because she is SO BUSY and she is a great speaker any

way so who needs to practice right?) If you want to win together as a team you have to work together as a team--and enjoy the results.

"You could see it on their faces"

For anyone to make it to the Olympics means they have dedicated their time to the pursuit of their sport. In gymnastics that means from a very early age, these young women have spent COUNTLESS hours in the gym working to perfect their craft. No matter how many hours one practices though, their ability to handle the pressure of the actual event itself is not always a certainty. The night of the team finals, the tension that Alicia Sacramone was feeling was evident in her face and body language both before the balance beam routine, during the balance beam routine, after the balance beam routine and yes, during her floor exercise. You could FEEL her anxiety and stress. How we MANAGE the stress is often what makes the difference between winning and losing. Now, compare Sacramone's display of anxiety and tension to that of the Chinese gymnasts who also had a setback with one of their girls on the balance beam: they were hugging, smiling, high fiving and it looked genuine--not tense and contrived.

Our gold medals are contracts, job promotions, etc.

What do you get for second place? In the corporate world...not much. So while sports metaphors may feel a little tired at times, the truth is there is much to be learned from this area of life.

-- Libby Spears

Attention! Please

2008-08-25T09:58:00.000-07:00

This month's tutorial on www.bravocc.com is about how to get your audience's attention using the rules from Dr. John Medina, author of one of our favorite books this year Brain Rules. Millie touched on a few of them with her post about Ted Koppel and how he used unexpectedness to captivate his audience. I think, at the heart of Dr. Medina's rules about presentations is that we MUST stimulate our audiences in some way or we might as well go home. If you do a lot of presentations and you begin them with the following:

1. Hello My name is __________
2. Ladies and Gentlemen
3. Today I am going to talk about
4. Thank you for being here

Then raise your right hand and slap your self on the face! THAT IS YOUR WAKE UP CALL. No one has captivated an audience with any of these attention getters--in the history of EVER (as my seven year old would say).

There is compelling research that suggests that audiences make up their mind in the first minute of a presentation if they are going to listen or not. And if you are not the first speaker of the day? Then get ready, your audience may tune out in less than 30 seconds! When we focus in on corporate speaking occasions I think these problems are even more prevalant. Corporate America loves a good meeting where men and women bore us to tears with the monotonous droning on and on about information that honestly, no one cares about!

So for your next presentation challenge yourself to find a way to get your audience's attention from the beginning. How?

1. Use visual language--if we can't literally see it, then paint us a picture that we can go to in our minds and see
2. Stop it with the old and tired cliches! I swear if anyone says "think outside the box" or "value added program" or "paradigm shift" to me I might punch them in the face. That is corporate speak! Don't do it!
3. Find a great story that is your own personal story or one you find in your research to open up the presentation with. For me--this is the best way to begin any presentation. People are captivated by (good) stories.
4. Don't be self-centered in the beginning or any part of the presentation. Recently I attended a speaking occasion where the CEO of the company kept saying "help me". Help me win, help me achieve, help me.... Yuck! Given the feedback afterwards, people were saying "help you? How bout' you help us! You are the one making the big bucks!".
5. Use (appropriate) humor. Well timed and well done humor puts us all at ease--speaker and audience alike.

You can do these things and separate yourself from the rest of the pack. QUIT doing it like everyone else does! Separate yourself from the mediocre. And watch the results....

-- Libby Spears

KoppelLine

2008-08-14T19:54:00.000-07:00

Jeff (my husband) and I just got back from Chicago where he attended a professional conference and I ate and walked and then ate some more. One of the big names that opened the first general session of the conference was none other than Ted Koppel. I'm still not clear on why an old news guy was speaking at a financial investment conference, but his speech provides a lesson in the value of candor and unexpectedness as a public speaker.

One of the elements of presentations that Libby and I talk about over and over is the importance of gaining the attention of your audience as soon as you start talking. This is just what Koppel did. According to Jeff, as soon as Ted Koppel came onto the stage, Jeff and everyone around him were struck by how short Koppel is. Wisely understanding how distracted his audience could be, Mr. Koppel succinctly addressed it in a humorous and lighthearted way: "I know what you're thinking" he said as he glanced at the much taller fellow next to him. Notice how disarming and unexpected such an acknowledgment is! It immediately shifts the focus of the audience from his height to him.

Another surprising and very unexpected element of Koppel's presentation was his use of humor to get the attention of the audience. Now, you may be thinking that the use of humor is not a novel way to start a speech. But wait! There's more! It was unexpected, not because it was funny, but because of what it was about. Ted Koppel told three, um, how shall I say . . . penis jokes. Yes, you read that right.

Oddly enough, his opening jokes were not in any way related to his core message (which, as you know, breaks a cardinal rule in presentations). Libby and I always teach that every word you say from the time you open your mouth to the time you close it should be directly relevant to your core message. However, Koppel gets a pass -- and here's why.

Ted Koppel had already established a great deal of credibility with his audience. Anybody remember those 25 years of Nightline? He was actually facing a different challenge than most of us when we give presentations: whereas we use the early portion of our presentations to create identification and credibility with our listeners, Koppel used his to combat widely held beliefs about his character and personality. By creating surprise in his listeners, he effectively forced them to open their minds to what would come next.

Don't get me wrong: I'm not advocating the use of off-color jokes to begin your next presentation. And I don't suggest that you reveal private things about yourself (unless they are readily apparent to your audience and have the potential to distract your listeners). But, take a lesson from Ted Koppel and surprise your audience every once in a while. Even if they only remember what surprised them and not your complete message, you will be the one they leave the meeting/interview/presentation talking about.

-- Millie Shaw

Get a Grip!

2008-08-12T07:17:00.000-07:00

Everyone's doing it! You've probably seen it on national television! It's the first viable alternative to the traditional handshake! The multi-talented Barack Obama demonstrated it a few weeks ago and got major national news coverage. Check it out . . .

Yes, I'm talking about the fist-bump (or dap, or dat -- whichever you prefer). And while all the flak Obama caught was pretty silly, one thing the incident illustrates is that handshaking is no longer the simple, uncomplicated introductory gesture it once was. Now there are any number of ways in which you can introduce yourself. That is, if you're under 21 or are desperately trying to hold on to your youth. For the rest of us, the traditional handshake is pretty much the only way to go.

I'm sure you've heard it before -- from your Dad, your Business 101 Instructor, or maybe your first boss -- a handshake is the first (and perhaps the most important) way that you establish your identity with another person. I've actually started teaching "How to Shake Hands" in my basic communication courses (I teach at a community college) because I have found that while many of my students can perform wildly involved and intricate forms of greeting, they can't do a good handshake to save their lives.

And, lest I be accused of focusing indictment on a particular group, let's take a look at the female handshake. Sorry, I couldn't find any videos on this one, but I experienced it the other night. I went in for a shake and was met with the "half-hand" instead. Huh? What are you supposed to do with that? Kiss it? Caress it? Hold it gently and admire it's delicacy?

No! You're supposed to shake it. I would much rather shake a man's hand simply because I almost always know what to expect. The firm grip, two-pump, shake-n-bake! I'm no self-hating woman (I am a woman, by the way) I just like to know what I'm going to get. And, I'll be honest, my immediate assessment of a person is impacted by whether they register on the "Weakling Scale" when we shake hands. (I'm not even going to address the limp handshake from men -- that's just a big, fat no.)

Do yourself a favor and develop a good handshake. You don't have to break someone's hand to let them know you're serious, but you do have to establish a presence and the way you do that is to be strong and firm and assertive. Go for the full shake where your thumb joints touch. Do two good pumps and then let go. It sounds simple -- and it is. But don't underestimate the impact that a simple handshake can have on the world. Just ask Barack Obama . . .

-- Millie Shaw